Shy guy trying to make a move on a girl.

[MiamiMermaid]

End of NEXT week? Jin you are a very generous person... I'd give it ten minutes myself... lol...

Anyway brother, if it doesn't work out, its OK. All the women you meet in your life are there to prepare you for the one that you ultimately wind up with. All the ones that break your heart, all the ones that date you, all the ones that reject you, they all do it so that you are eventualy molded into the person that the very last girl loves to be with. If they didn't do all that molding, then you would never be that person the last girl loves. Its hard to see that sometimes, but it becomes clear as day later.

I can guarantee you that if this one doesn't work out, your tactic will be a bit different next time. And that's the whole process. In a way, she is doing you a favor EITHER way... so no reason to be upset at all. .

*Perfect and completely true*

 

[zezeq]

Very nice car. Mine was also bought by the same person who brought your car. :biggrin: What year of study are you in UK and what course are you studying?

Yeah, where else can the NSX be purchase except yours has the facelifted version. Too bad most of the BMW are in bad condition. NSX and Merc SL was better. Only two BMW 3 series that day.
Do you have the list of how many NSX "he" has? I do have it and can PM you if you want.
I'm continuing 2nd year degree in London and I'm taking BIM(Business Info Management).

 

[NeoNSX]

Edwardo, that is one of the funniest posts i've read on prime in a long time. Is that how you do things down in texas? I might need to track down anchorman too... thanks... i really needed that laugh.



<B>JIN</B>: DUDE! Ask her!!! The window of opportunity is closing! And you're building up all this unhealthy expectation for yourself and her. Just ask her out (on phone or in person) for a friendly coffee or lunch or something. Keep it simple... and keep us posted. I keep coming back here to see how you're going!


<B>TURBO2GO</B>: man, that's some seriously mind-messing philosophy you got there... did you pick that up of daytime drama TV or something? Then again, you got a positive response from Mermi so it must work. thanx bro

 

[MiamiMermaid]

All right, it's been four days now. I can't take this anymore Jin. We need to get to the bottom of this RIGHT NOW!

My opinion is that you may be suffering from a bit of low self confidence in the ladies department. You can check this by asking yourself:

"Self, do I have a hard time meeting and talking to dudes, or is it just pretty girls?"

If you are just shy, then it may be a good idea to read Turbo's eloquent lovey-dovey posts and try to "understand" the mindset of a woman. Good luck with this *snickers*.

Or, you could engadge in some temporary, albeit unconventional self confidence-boosting techniques.

1. Buy yourself a cucumber and a pair of penis pants.
2. Equip said items from number one
3. Go to your bathroom at work, and recite these words while looking at yourself in the mirror.

"Jin, you look good. No, no no, you look DAMN GOOD!"

4. Step back a bit. and do a couple of bodybuilder poses in front of the mirror.
5. Check hair
6. Apply minty scented breath spray
7. Exit the bathroom and begin your...
8. STRUT, not walk towards her desk. (If you do not know what "strutting" is, watch a few clips of John Travolta or U.S. President Bush walk around)
9. Midway to her desk, ensure that your vegetable is pointing down and angled to the left (this is a rather important step for obvious reasons - see the movie Anchorman to gain insight as to why it is important)
10. Approach woman, and engadge in friendly banter. Ensure that you have that- I don't give a shit attititude coming through loud and clear). Make a deliberaly stupid joke and sort of half-laugh, half-laugh a little more until she is staring at you as if you are really weird. And then your crazed half laugh expression must turn in to...
11. An expression of complete and total seriousness, and you say all smooth- like - drawing your words out - holding her in suspense...
12. "Sooo, where are we going tonight?"

Well, that's it Jin. Hopefully, my TACTICAL advice will help you a bit more than the fluff I am reading in this thread.

*Disclaimer* I am only joking and I wish you all the best Jin. Realistically, I think you just have to ask yourself, what is the worst that could happen?

 

[Jin1976]

Please do. Also if you have His Highness other exotics list. If I get better pay in the coming years I might want to get myself another exotics provided I'm still bachelor at that time. Have you sit in the 512TR and the custom order 456GT-M during the auction. I've heard there will be another one in this coming month.

Yeah, where else can the NSX be purchase except yours has the facelifted version. Too bad most of the BMW are in bad condition. NSX and Merc SL was better. Only two BMW 3 series that day.
Do you have the list of how many NSX "he" has? I do have it and can PM you if you want.
I'm continuing 2nd year degree in London and I'm taking BIM(Business Info Management).

 

[Jin1976]

I guess the best way would probably to ask another lady an opinion. Mermi, if it were you how would you like to be treated the first time someone at work is interested in you? :smile:

Edwardo, that is one of the funniest posts i've read on prime in a long time. Is that how you do things down in texas? I might need to track down anchorman too... thanks... i really needed that laugh.



<B>JIN</B>: DUDE! Ask her!!! The window of opportunity is closing! And you're building up all this unhealthy expectation for yourself and her. Just ask her out (on phone or in person) for a friendly coffee or lunch or something. Keep it simple... and keep us posted. I keep coming back here to see how you're going!


<B>TURBO2GO</B>: man, that's some seriously mind-messing philosophy you got there... did you pick that up of daytime drama TV or something? Then again, you got a positive response from Mermi so it must work. thanx bro

 

[kenjiMR]

how to pick up women:

1. attract
show value by: showing you have skillz, confident, bad boy, talent, no fear, show that you can dominate her. In your mind, you have to know you are above her.

2. comfort
make her comfortable being around you, show connections, talk about things that are in common, but first you need to do #1

3. seduce
get physical

You have to do these things within a range of time, 7 hours for a fast one night stand, or 10 days for a long term relationship.

You have to take charge of a woman, don't let her decide much in the beginning... Women get turned on buy confident guys that take charge. With these simple rules you can get laid a lot.

edit:
Don't ever ask if they have a boyfriend. It doesn't matter, they may say they do even if they don't. They won't give you a straight answer until you have attracted them. Luckily for men, looks are only 20% important while 80% is your attitude.

PPS.
Another method during attract phase is to disqualify them, the prettier they are you have to disqualify her more. For example: If she's hot, tell her: "I think you'd look better with short hair" (if she has long hair) etc. The hotter they are the more shocking it should be.

 

[DocL]

Jin, you need to take a crap or get off the toilet. Just call the chick and ask her out for dinner. The more you look for answers here, the more time you are wasting. Furthermore, no one here knows what exactly you want, o it's obvious though that you are afraid of something. Everyone at one time or another is afraid of rejection, but that's part of life.

The next post that I want to read from you is a summary of the first date. :smile:

 

[TURBO2GO]

how to pick up women:

1. attract
show value by: showing you have skillz, confident, bad boy, talent, no fear, show that you can dominate her. In your mind, you have to know you are above her.

I am not sure this is good advice for a shy guy.

Jin, there are three types of guys. Shy guys, Confident guys, and actors.

The first is actually charming to some, the second is charming to all, the third is charming to none.

Whatever you do, don't cop an attitude of superiority. It won't be you. Your being shy can be an asset... there is something sincere in just admitting you are a shy guy if you convey this to the girl at the right moment. All of a sudden instead of being an annoying hound, you become a lost puppy.

It takes a certain level of confidence to admit this. Why do you think Mermi is writing you? because your honesty of admitting you are shy has a charm of its own.

Don't try to be something you aren't, the advice I gave was to have VALUE for your feelings, not to become an actor. There is nothing worse than a shy guy trying to act confident. You won't find all sorts of confidence overnight based on the advice of some member. That comes with time.

For now, see your shyness as an asset not as a liability. That can be very appealing to a woman.

 

[kenjiMR]

I am not sure this is good advice for a shy guy.

Jin, there are three types of guys. Shy guys, Confident guys, and actors.

The first is actually charming to some, the second is charming to all, the third is charming to none.

Whatever you do, don't cop an attitude of superiority. It won't be you. Your being shy can be an asset... there is something sincere in just admitting you are a shy guy if you convey this to the girl at the right moment.

It takes a certain level of confidence to admit this. Why do you think Mermi is writing you? because your honesty of admitting you are shy has a charm of its own.

Don't try to be something you aren't, the advice I gave was to have VALUE for your feelings, not to become an actor. There is nothing worse than a shy guy trying to act confident. You won't find all sorts of confidence overnight based on the advice of some member. That comes with time.

For now, see your shyness as an asset not as a liability. That can be very appealing to a woman.

I disagree. It is very difficult to gain confidence without success, once you are successfull, then confidence naturally occurs. In the beginning, I don't see any fault in testing various angles to see what works. Eventually, you'll have the natural confidence to deal with any type of woman. My suggestions work better for hotter girls. As for ugly girls, you don't need to do much, just make them feel good and you'll have them.

edit: to clearify, very few women will accept a shy guy. You don't want to be that guy, the girl will walk all over you. You need to fix your shyness, then she will chase you.

 

[TURBO2GO]

I disagree. It is very difficult to gain confidence without success, once you are successfull, then confidence naturally occurs. In the beginning, I don't see any fault in testing various angles to see what works. Eventually, you'll have the natural confidence to deal with any type of woman. My suggestions work better for hotter girls. As for ugly girls, you don't need to do much, just make them feel good and you'll have them.

edit: to clearify, very few women will accept a shy guy. You don't want to be that guy, the girl will walk all over you.

Women will accept a shy guy. Women will not accept a guy with no backbone or character of his own. If you are shy because you don't know who you are, then Kenji, you are absolutely correct. The woman will not accept you, and may walk all over you. But if you know who you are, being shy is just a personality trait that can be fully accepted by her.

Jin can be shy about asking her out, but Jin can be very confident and say "no" when she asks for something unreasonable.

 

[kenjiMR]

Women will accept a shy guy. Women will not accept a guy with no backbone or character of his own. If you are shy because you don't know who you are, then Kenji, you are absolutely correct. The woman will not accept you, and may walk all over you. But if you know who you are, being shy is just a personality trait that can be fully accepted by her.

Jin can be shy about asking her out, but Jin can be very confident and say "no" when she asks for something unreasonable.

I don't know what the difference between "no backbone and character" and shy. To her (a person she doesn't know anything about), they will appear to be the same until she gets to know you... which is giving HER the power. If you want a beautifull girl, you have to be different and exciting. Don't be boring. If you are boring, you are the same as all the other chumps who has tried to have her. Anyway, it all really depends on what you are looking for. I like beautifull women. For beautifull women, you need sophisticated tactics.

Being shy and boring won't get you beautifull women, I think everyone knows that.

Edit: for dates, don't go to dinner and movie. That is BORING! How many times do you think she has done that already?

 

[MiamiMermaid]

I guess the best way would probably to ask another lady an opinion. Mermi, if it were you how would you like to be treated the first time someone at work is interested in you? :smile:

Definitely NOT this way: unbelievably the most ridiculous post I think I have read on this board..... this will most definitely get you a knee in the groin and/or complete lack of attention/respect/play from any women of respect and value

how to pick up women:

1. attract
show value by: showing you have skillz, confident, bad boy, talent, no fear, show that you can dominate her. In your mind, you have to know you are above her.

2. comfort
make her comfortable being around you, show connections, talk about things that are in common, but first you need to do #1

3. seduce
get physical

You have to do these things within a range of time, 7 hours for a fast one night stand, or 10 days for a long term relationship.

You have to take charge of a woman, don't let her decide much in the beginning... Women get turned on buy confident guys that take charge. With these simple rules you can get laid a lot.

edit:
Don't ever ask if they have a boyfriend. It doesn't matter, they may say they do even if they don't. They won't give you a straight answer until you have attracted them. Luckily for men, looks are only 20% important while 80% is your attitude.

PPS.
Another method during attract phase is to disqualify them, the prettier they are you have to disqualify her more. For example: If she's hot, tell her: "I think you'd look better with short hair" (if she has long hair) etc. The hotter they are the more shocking it should be.

Wow, I'm still lmbo at how off this dude is. Wow, Anyways...

hehe, Jin.... I agree with the majority of people who have posted. You've received a lot of really invaluable advice. I especially agree with Turbo2Go's philosophy. Really demonstrates the 'greater' picture so as to allow yourself the freedom to be , well, you. (Which, by the way, is a great thing ). I also think that it's "time" ..... What I mean by that, is , you should just take the initiative and invite her to a date. I really like how FrEsHaZzBuRu gave examples (kinda like a 'cheat sheet' :biggrin: ) on how to ask her on this date.

All in all, I think, just follow your heart. You're such a genuine and cool guy, I see no reason at all for you not to feel confident and take a chance. Like Edward said "what's truly the worst that can happen? And that question is easily answered by Turbo2Go's "destiny" theory. It's all good
Be confident! You have the right to be!!
***p.s. confident does not mean obnoxious as kenjimr uses this term. Confident as in confident of yourself, enough so that you are able to display your respect not only for yourself, but also the respect for your lady!

But, please, by all means, do not listen to the foolishness of the above post... I seriously feel for him waaaaaaaaaay off!

 

[MiamiMermaid]

I don't know what the difference between "no backbone and character" and shy. To her (a person she doesn't know anything about), they will appear to be the same until she gets to know you... which is giving HER the power. If you want a beautifull girl, you have to be different and exciting. Don't be boring. If you are boring, you are the same as all the other chumps who has tried to have her. Anyway, it all really depends on what you are looking for. I like beautifull women. For beautifull women, you need sophisticated tactics.

Being shy and boring won't get you beautifull women, I think everyone knows that.

Edit: for dates, don't go to dinner and movie. That is BORING! How many times do you think she has done that already?

Do you consider your first post of :cough cough: advice to be that of sophiscated tactic ? I mean, none of the beautiful ladies I know would stand one moment of this type of "acting." Its stench spells out insecurity, disrespect, lack of social skills, ad nauseum. Why would an attractive, successful lady be interested in some dude who belittles her when she can easily turn the corner and find a man who appreciates her beauty. Just because a lady holds beauty does not mean she is out to hurt you. Nor does it provide you the right to demean her, due to your own insecurities. I believe in the power of self respect first, and then sharing that with others. The art of love is building one another up, not the opposite.

 

[MiamiMermaid]

Jin, you need to take a crap or get off the toilet. Just call the chick and ask her out for dinner. The more you look for answers here, the more time you are wasting. Furthermore, no one here knows what exactly you want, o it's obvious though that you are afraid of something. Everyone at one time or another is afraid of rejection, but that's part of life.

The next post that I want to read from you is a summary of the first date. :smile:

LMBO!! :biggrin:

Classic!! But quite true!! This seriously has me chucklin! Silly Doc :tongue:

 

[Jin1976]

I would only say no if someone want to drive my NSX. :biggrin: Another problem is that girl is also shy. :redface: Thanks for the advise mermi. I'll ask her at the right time.

Women will accept a shy guy. Women will not accept a guy with no backbone or character of his own. If you are shy because you don't know who you are, then Kenji, you are absolutely correct. The woman will not accept you, and may walk all over you. But if you know who you are, being shy is just a personality trait that can be fully accepted by her.

Jin can be shy about asking her out, but Jin can be very confident and say "no" when she asks for something unreasonable.

 

[kenjiMR]

Do you consider your first post of :cough cough: advice to be that of sophiscated tactic ? I mean, none of the beautiful ladies I know would stand one moment of this type of "acting." Its stench spells out insecurity, disrespect, lack of social skills, ad nauseum. Why would an attractive, successful lady be interested in some dude who belittles her when she can easily turn the corner and find a man who appreciates her beauty. Just because a lady holds beauty does not mean she is out to hurt you. Nor does it provide you the right to demean her, due to your own insecurities. I believe in the power of self respect first, and then sharing that with others. The art of love is building one another up, not the opposite.

I'm drunk at the moment, but I will post anyways. To guys: don't believe the woman. I was giving an angle of how to build confidence. People have to build confidence one way or the other. Woman will say one thing, but mean the other. I'm sure you've seen this before. Women love illogical things, they want to be seduced... it has to happen naturally. BUT! If you present things in a way that appears natural to them, they will never know the difference. She will never want to be seduced this way, but I'm just giving the advice to understand how they work. Mermaid doesn't want to accept woman are this easy...

If you are nervous or uncomfortable, that energy will be transfered to her when you are around her. Don't do it. Go chase ugly girls for a while to build your confidence, when you are ready, go after the hot ones. DO NOT GET ADVICE FROM WOMAN!!!!

EDIT: reality check. The older the woman gets, the more logical they become and realistic... if they are still single as they approach the 30s, they will be able to reason with you more and will bargon accordingly.

 

[gheba_nsx]

I'm drunk at the moment, ... Go chase ugly girls for a while to build your confidence, when you are ready, go after the hot ones. DO NOT GET ADVICE FROM WOMAN!!!!

...AND NOT FROM DRUNK MEN!

:biggrin: :biggrin: :biggrin: :wink:

 

[kenjiMR]

...AND NOT FROM DRUNK MEN!

:biggrin: :biggrin: :biggrin: :wink:

hehe... for sure. I'm just having fun with this thread anyways. I don't have a problem getting ass.... I apply my formula.

for what its worth. I'm a very average looking guy 5' 7" living in Man Jose (Silicon Valley)... my angle is too hardcore for average girls around the country, but if you want to nail 9s and 10s in LA... you need to have a good angle for sure.

PS. [gheba] I was in Bern Switzerland in Jan 2006, I seduced a girl to let me stay with her till 5AM until my train arrived because no train was available when I was trying to go from Prague to Val Disere (France).

 

[zezeq]

Jin,

All the best to you. Hope you can get the girl you wanted
BTW I hope you don't mind around next summer(June), we can have photoshoot of our cars. at the Jerudong location

 

[steveny]

End of NEXT week? Jin you are a very generous person... I'd give it ten minutes myself... lol...

Anyway brother, if it doesn't work out, its OK. All the women you meet in your life are there to prepare you for the one that you ultimately wind up with. All the ones that break your heart, all the ones that date you, all the ones that reject you, they all do it so that you are eventualy molded into the person that the very last girl loves to be with. If they didn't do all that molding, then you would never be that person the last girl loves. Its hard to see that sometimes, but it becomes clear as day later.

I can guarantee you that if this one doesn't work out, your tactic will be a bit different next time. And that's the whole process. In a way, she is doing you a favor EITHER way... so no reason to be upset at all. I love those women that rejected me in the past. Thank God for them. I owe them all my success.

This is so true. A little off topic here, but.... My sister is musician and I asked her to pick the music for my wedding last year. I finally got married at 40. My sister has seen all I have been through in the last 40 years. As I stood at the alter waiting my sister sang this song for me....

I set out on a narrow way, many years ago
Hoping I would find true love along the broken road
But I got lost a time or two
Wiped my brow and kept pushing through
I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you

Chorus:
Every long lost dream
Lead me to where you are
Others who broke my heart
They were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way
Into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God bless the broken road
That lead me straight to you.

I think about the years I spent
Just passing through
Tryin' to find the time I lost
And give it back to you
And you just smile and take my hand
You been there, you understand
It's all part of a grander plan
And that is coming true.

And god bless the broken road
that lead me straight to you

All I can say is it's a good thing it was an outside wedding and a sunny day so I could wear sunglasses.

Good luck Jin!

 

[steveny]

I don't know what the difference between "no backbone and character" and shy. To her (a person she doesn't know anything about), they will appear to be the same until she gets to know you... which is giving HER the power. If you want a beautifull girl, you have to be different and exciting. Don't be boring. If you are boring, you are the same as all the other chumps who has tried to have her. Anyway, it all really depends on what you are looking for. I like beautifull women. For beautifull women, you need sophisticated tactics.

Being shy and boring won't get you beautifull women, I think everyone knows that.

Edit: for dates, don't go to dinner and movie. That is BORING! How many times do you think she has done that already?

Yeah! go rob a bank on the first date...VERY exciting!!!!!:biggrin:

 

[DocL]

EDIT: reality check. The older the woman gets, the more logical they become and realistic... if they are still single as they approach the 30s, they will be able to reason with you more and will bargon accordingly.

I have to disagree. Those women that are in their 30's and are still single usually have way too many hang-ups and cats. Furthermore, the older some women get, they most likely Can't Understand Normal Thinking. :wink:

 

[TURBO2GO]

I don't know what the difference between "no backbone and character" and shy.

A shy guy is shy about one thing... how to handle himself around women, because he is inexperienced.

I have many friends like this. Guys that have good character that you can rely on and trust. A guy that has values and is respectful of people. But these same guys, due to a lack of experience, for whatever reason, are somewhat shy around women.

So they ask for advice and the advice given to them often is that women don't know what they want and that they will never get anywhere being "a nice guy". So they are then asked to become something they are not, and they lose the one characteristic that was somewhat appealing.

I think your advice is well meant, and I also think mixed in there, there is some validity to some of your points. But those "tactics" will only go so far and only with certain women. At times, they will bite you in the ass.

A real "player" (for the lack of a better term), is a guy who does not even KNOW that he is a player. His success comes from legitimate qualities, not from some fake act or tactic.

An encounter with a woman is a very fluid situation, and trying to apply any sort of pre-determined tactic or strategy will many times fail.

The difference is that an experienced man reads her responses instantly, and adjusts quickly according to what the goal of the situation is, whereas the inexperienced guy is lost. In certain instances, with a girl that is hot, conceited, not too smart, and you want a one night stand, your tactics kenji are probably the right ones.

Real confidence comes with practice, time, and some serious self examination. The last, is unfortunately what few guys ever do, but they expect women to fall for them because they are "a nice guy".

Self examination will bring into light one's qualities as well as weaknesses, almost none of which are things that cannot be changed for the better. If you don't know how to salsa for example, you better learn. This examination eventually creates a more well-rounded person, who in turn becomes naturally more atrractive, who in turn gains confidence from the reaction he recieves from women all around him.

 

[kenjiMR]

A shy guy is shy about one thing... how to handle himself around women, because he is inexperienced.

I have many friends like this. Guys that have good character that you can rely on and trust. A guy that has values and is respectful of people. But these same guys, due to a lack of experience, for whatever reason, are somewhat shy around women.

So they ask for advice and the advice given to them often is that women don't know what they want and that they will never get anywhere being "a nice guy". So they are then asked to become something they are not, and they lose the one characteristic that was somewhat appealing.

I think your advice is well meant, and I also think mixed in there, there is some validity to some of your points. But those "tactics" will only go so far and only with certain women. At times, they will bite you in the ass.

A real "player" (for the lack of a better term), is a guy who does not even KNOW that he is a player. His success comes from legitimate qualities, not from some fake act or tactic.

An encounter with a woman is a very fluid situation, and trying to apply any sort of pre-determined tactic or strategy will many times fail.

The difference is that an experienced man reads her responses instantly, and adjusts quickly according to what the goal of the situation is, whereas the inexperienced guy is lost. In certain instances, with a girl that is hot, conceited, not too smart, and you want a one night stand, your tactics kenji are probably the right ones.

Real confidence comes with practice, time, and some serious self examination. The last, is unfortunately what few guys ever do, but they expect women to fall for them because they are "a nice guy".

Self examination will bring into light one's qualities as well as weaknesses, almost none of which are things that cannot be changed for the better. If you don't know how to salsa for example, you better learn. This examination eventually creates a more well-rounded person, who in turn becomes naturally more atrractive, who in turn gains confidence from the reaction he recieves from women all around him.

Fair enough, well said. The point about calibrating her responses instantly is definitely something that takes time to learn. I initially was offering some kick start advice for the flow of the game. As long as you know who you are and keep your core values in tact, I think people should be free to study the art of seduction as deep as they want. All is fair in love and war.