Well I am sure this is a normal thing in life with all of us who love cars. I met a great girl and things are just clicking away for us. In fact we are talking about all the usual stuff that comes up when couples get serious. Well the subject of " the car" came up. I just bought it in April. The car is paid for ( sold my Ducati and 300zx for it) but I still have debt from when I was racing a bunch on my bicycle. She wants me to move up to Dallas but with a clean slate. Which means no debt. Which means I could sell the car and then get a vw Jetta or something. I also just ordered some rims from Iforged which will be in this month! AAAAHHHH I do not know what to do. I know she is on the sensible side of things but my emotions on my car are high. I have always wanted that car since I was 15 and have been working hard for it. What should I do?
Please Help Me!!
- Thread starter Kenny York
- Start date
Sex and money are big issues in relationships. Sounds like the sex is good and you are talking about money and that's a good thing. Having some debt is part of life, having too much debt is bad. I am not sure why you would need to have no debt to be able to spend more time with your girl. Is she worried about you being a deadbeat or does she not want to share your attention(money) with the bank.
If your girlfriend isn't interested in understanding you interest in your NSX you may have to rethink your interest in her.
If your girlfriend isn't interested in understanding you interest in your NSX you may have to rethink your interest in her.
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I agree. Don't give up your car for a girl. That is just stupid. She has to understand your needs too!
Construct an argument to appeal to her sensible side. It's easy with the NSX, since a "Jetta or something" (but especially a Jetta) will depreciate more and have many more problems than your NSX.
I mean if we have kids than I would sell my car only when we have kids and that would not bother me as much. Because kids do come first or they should atleast 
Would Dali Racing make a child seat above the engine cover? j/k I just wanted some feedback and opinions on what I should do. I do not want to make a decision and then feel like dookie if it does not workout.
Is this just the price of love?
Would Dali Racing make a child seat above the engine cover? j/k I just wanted some feedback and opinions on what I should do. I do not want to make a decision and then feel like dookie if it does not workout.Is this just the price of love?
I dont know if it will work for your woman, but I had a similar issue. Do what you have to make her know beyond a doubt that she is numero uno, Im sure she wouldnt mind letting the nsx take second place. Good luck to you.
Tell her you will move to Dallas just as soon as your car is paid for. 
Kenny...Hold up a second!!!!!
This issue about debt is bigger than your car!!! You need to sit down with her and talk about both your issues with money, what both your goals are, and how you both handle money, cause it WILL come up again, and often if its not straightened out.
Example: Do you get the house or splurge on the wedding??? Do you get the Big Screen or put it in the bank?? Do you let her get weekly facials and manicures or go to a ball game???
my .02
This issue about debt is bigger than your car!!! You need to sit down with her and talk about both your issues with money, what both your goals are, and how you both handle money, cause it WILL come up again, and often if its not straightened out.
Example: Do you get the house or splurge on the wedding??? Do you get the Big Screen or put it in the bank?? Do you let her get weekly facials and manicures or go to a ball game???
my .02
Tell her if you don't get to keep the NSX, she will have to settle for a CZ instead of a real diamond. Hell, just get her a CZ anyway--an NSX is much more fun than a big piece of rock. 
Seriously, don't let this turn into a parent-child relationship with her dictating how you should run your life. You'll only end up resenting her control over you after the infatuation wears off. Learn responsible money management for yourself, then decide whether keeping the NSX is in line with your financial goals. Good luck!
Seriously, don't let this turn into a parent-child relationship with her dictating how you should run your life. You'll only end up resenting her control over you after the infatuation wears off. Learn responsible money management for yourself, then decide whether keeping the NSX is in line with your financial goals. Good luck!
I owe 20k from racing and bike stuff. I am paying $1000 a month and I can sell 2 bikes for 4k. And onother one for 6k That would bring some of it down?
Kenny,
This is ridiculous.
If you were in love with the NSX at the early age of 15 than she has to take you with the car. It is a part of your needs (live). Your girlfriend has to take you as you are. I think she has to think of your needs as well as you have to think of hers.
Will you be happy with her if you have to sell a dream to get her love????
I should say: "Take me with it or leave me without it!"
When I met my wife (24 years ago) I had a motorcycle (I had a lot of debts because of it than). It was no issue. If I had to choose between the bike and the girl than the love wasn't strong enough.
I am happily married for 23 years now. I still have a motorbike and the NSX ofcourse.
Good luck..............
This is ridiculous.
If you were in love with the NSX at the early age of 15 than she has to take you with the car. It is a part of your needs (live). Your girlfriend has to take you as you are. I think she has to think of your needs as well as you have to think of hers.
Will you be happy with her if you have to sell a dream to get her love????
I should say: "Take me with it or leave me without it!"
When I met my wife (24 years ago) I had a motorcycle (I had a lot of debts because of it than). It was no issue. If I had to choose between the bike and the girl than the love wasn't strong enough.
I am happily married for 23 years now. I still have a motorbike and the NSX ofcourse.
Good luck..............
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There are a lot of other factors to consider. If it were me, and I was living below my means (i.e., monthly expenses < after-tax income), I would get rid of everything but one toy, assuming I wasn't paying highway robbery rates on the debt (or outrageously expensive insurance premiums), and I had a secure job & access to emergency funds. However, it's your life, and things are probably far more complicated than the numbers indicate, so you'll have to assess your circumstances and decide the right course of action for yourself.Kenny York said:
sell the nsx, and stuff...move up and buy another cheaper one. That way, you won't be in debt, have an NSX (although with higher miles and an earlier year) and probably some money on the side. Atleast I think that should work.....
That way, you won't be in debt, have an NSX (although with higher miles and an earlier year) and probably some money on the side. Atleast I think that should work.....mine is already an " old one"... 1991 blk/ ivory lea.. 86,000 miles with all service done ( hoses, belts, water pump, new airconditioning system, spark plugs) crossed/ drilled rotors, DC deaders, dali swaybars, newer shocks, Alpine mp3/ cd player,Phoenix Gold Amp, Ifiniti perfect component system speakers, SOS center console piece, 8 inch punch speaker, I forged wheels and Nittio tires NEW ( o miles) 1994 wheels with 90 % tread left. New Comptech exhaust. new battery, Just got the inspection done too! If I sold it what could I get it for?
oh and new clutch and am waiting on some eibch springs.
Kenny York said:
This says it ALL. Sure, material stuff isn't everything. But when you work hard for your toys, it says a lot about you. Quite frankly, it's not unreasonable.
Obviously she doesn't put the same worth on a "car" as you. But she needs to understand that you do. The only way for you to get her to do that is for you to open your mouth. But explain in a caring, loving way.
Dr. Phil has now left the building.
you might want to consider how much you'd resent being told you need to get rid of the car....
i'm sure she has some issues/baggage as all normal folks do. what's next after the nsx? all your bikes (can't put a kid on the bike, after all...)?? Your model train set? Your playstation? Your new birthday sox your mom got you? pretty soon you'll be the pu$$y we see getting whipped in all those movies...and next thing you know you're having a breakdown like Michael Douglas with a 12-gauge on the freeway!!
i'm sure she has some issues/baggage as all normal folks do. what's next after the nsx? all your bikes (can't put a kid on the bike, after all...)?? Your model train set? Your playstation? Your new birthday sox your mom got you? pretty soon you'll be the pu$$y we see getting whipped in all those movies...and next thing you know you're having a breakdown like Michael Douglas with a 12-gauge on the freeway!!
.."Hey, Im not P*ssy-whipped....I whips P*ssy!"
whats THAT from????
>>jeopardy music playing<<
whats THAT from????
>>jeopardy music playing<<
Okay, you said it was the subject of "the car" that came up. If the subject came up in terms of the car, then it's about the car, not the money you owe. The money is just a cover story. Loads of people are far more than $20k in debt. It's quite likely that she sees the car as a problem, possibly being competition for your attention, or as a money sink, or as where her mondo engagement ring is going to come from, and so she wants to get rid of it.
Personally, I would consider that unacceptable. It's very negative energy and it's manipulative.
If that's the way she insists on being, trust me, you do not want her. These are signs of things to come.
Personally, I would consider that unacceptable. It's very negative energy and it's manipulative.
If that's the way she insists on being, trust me, you do not want her. These are signs of things to come.
Let me see if I get this right: she loves you and wants for you two to be together forever as long as you start the realationship by meeting all her demands such as (1) moving to [ostensibly] her hometown of Dallas, (2) selling your dream NSX, and (3) being debt free.
I can see this manipulation half a continent away and I don't even know you. Unfortunately, sir, you are being manipulated. You need to have a very serious long talk with her to discuss the possibilities of life together, what you will and will not do, and what your common and individual goals are.
Seriously, don't be her b1tch.
I can see this manipulation half a continent away and I don't even know you. Unfortunately, sir, you are being manipulated. You need to have a very serious long talk with her to discuss the possibilities of life together, what you will and will not do, and what your common and individual goals are.
Seriously, don't be her b1tch.
No offense brother, but who wears the pants in the family. It sounds like you lived fast and free in the past and now have to pay for it. As long as you are not continuing that expensive lifestyle then what is the big deal.
Let me get this straight. You currently own a paid for NSX and three bikes worth a total of 10k, plus you pay $1000 per month to pay off your debt? Am I hearing or reading you correctly? Then what the hell do you need to sell your NSX for anyway besides the girlfiriend wanting complete control. Sell your bikes and continue paying $1000 and you will have this paid off in less than ONE YEAR. The only reason to sell the NSX is to pay it off immediately or unless your car needs a lot of mechanical work.
My wife wanted me to sell my car too, but since I am the one who pays for it, she doesn't much of a say in the matter. This is not the price of love. Love is about compromise and not control. We all moved out of our mother's house and we don't need to bring on another one.
Is your debt something that she is going to have to pay for and that is why she is reacting like this? Would a woman sell her Prada shoes or a Gucci purse to get some extra money after it is paid for? NO!
Now it would be a different story if you were falling behind because you were paying a lot of money for the NSX, maintenance, or just getting ready to buy it. Then not a smart decision. If you can afford the NSX, $1000, plus living expenses by yourself, then it should only get easier by combining two incomes together will it not? Bite the bullet for a year and pay for your mistakes. The NSX is not one of them. Since it is about compromising, then get a second job bartending or something two nights a week to pay it off faster. If she was truly just being responsible, then she would understand that, but it sounds like this is coming from a selfish point of view.
Let me get this straight. You currently own a paid for NSX and three bikes worth a total of 10k, plus you pay $1000 per month to pay off your debt? Am I hearing or reading
you correctly? Then what the hell do you need to sell your NSX for anyway besides the girlfiriend wanting complete control. Sell your bikes and continue paying $1000 and you will have this paid off in less than ONE YEAR. The only reason to sell the NSX is to pay it off immediately or unless your car needs a lot of mechanical work. My wife wanted me to sell my car too, but since I am the one who pays for it, she doesn't much of a say in the matter. This is not the price of love. Love is about compromise and not control. We all moved out of our mother's house and we don't need to bring on another one.
Is your debt something that she is going to have to pay for and that is why she is reacting like this? Would a woman sell her Prada shoes or a Gucci purse to get some extra money after it is paid for? NO!
Now it would be a different story if you were falling behind because you were paying a lot of money for the NSX, maintenance, or just getting ready to buy it. Then not a smart decision. If you can afford the NSX, $1000, plus living expenses by yourself, then it should only get easier by combining two incomes together will it not? Bite the bullet for a year and pay for your mistakes. The NSX is not one of them. Since it is about compromising, then get a second job bartending or something two nights a week to pay it off faster. If she was truly just being responsible, then she would understand that, but it sounds like this is coming from a selfish point of view.
I've been reading all this and come to this conclusion.... it has nothing to do with the car. Its all about new beginnings and having less problems when you start your relationship.
Perhaps the problem could be debt... maybe. But perhaps she is worried that YOU may get too much attention from the opposite sex while driving your NSX that she is not prepared to deal with. This would indicate #1 - she is not mature enough to deal with jealousy or #2 - you are not proving your devotion to her. Which do you think?
I hope you get to keep both!
Perhaps the problem could be debt... maybe. But perhaps she is worried that YOU may get too much attention from the opposite sex while driving your NSX that she is not prepared to deal with. This would indicate #1 - she is not mature enough to deal with jealousy or #2 - you are not proving your devotion to her. Which do you think?
I hope you get to keep both!
Keep the car
Man of few words says... don't even think of selling the car!!!!Everybody needs at least one vice, and the NSX is the perfect one!
Man of few words says... don't even think of selling the car!!!!Everybody needs at least one vice, and the NSX is the perfect one!
what most women think
ok... I got a comparison from my wife when I wanted to get the X. I could not get the first one, luckily there was a second one. She used the idea that if she just all of a sudden wanted to get a 3carat diamond ring, would I mind.
Basically most women care differently about a car than guys do. Don't know... majority I know place very small value of the nsx, some say, its just a car...
I think if this is the right gal and you are very sure you need to look at your income to debt ratio. You'll be happy that you are in not too much debt after selling some of those bikes. IF the NSX is on top of the list of "gotta have". But in no way should you really give in. After giving in with scenarios like this, you will end up miserable in the long run. You need a woman that can understand your passion and be able to compromise with you in life. I am really happy that I found someone that understands me. I know spending that much on a car is not really logical, when your not a millionare, but we worked it out so that she feels like I've got control of the situation... Believe it or not women like to see that the man has control over his environment. They just want you to be sensible about your decisions. If shes after something else....YOU NEED to RETHINK YOUR situation.
ok... I got a comparison from my wife when I wanted to get the X. I could not get the first one, luckily there was a second one. She used the idea that if she just all of a sudden wanted to get a 3carat diamond ring, would I mind.
Basically most women care differently about a car than guys do. Don't know... majority I know place very small value of the nsx, some say, its just a car...
I think if this is the right gal and you are very sure you need to look at your income to debt ratio. You'll be happy that you are in not too much debt after selling some of those bikes. IF the NSX is on top of the list of "gotta have". But in no way should you really give in. After giving in with scenarios like this, you will end up miserable in the long run. You need a woman that can understand your passion and be able to compromise with you in life. I am really happy that I found someone that understands me. I know spending that much on a car is not really logical, when your not a millionare, but we worked it out so that she feels like I've got control of the situation... Believe it or not women like to see that the man has control over his environment. They just want you to be sensible about your decisions. If shes after something else....YOU NEED to RETHINK YOUR situation.
