Why I fired my secretary today

Joined
31 May 2006
Messages
786
Location
Hazerswoude, The Netherlands
Last week was my birthday
and I didn't feel very well
waking up on that morning.

I went downstairs for breakfast
hoping my wife would be pleasant
and say, "Happy Birthday!", and
possibly have a small present for me

As it turned out,
she barely said good morning,
let alone "Happy Birthday."

I thought...
Well, that's marriage for you,
but the kids....
They will remember.

My kids came bounding down stairs to
breakfast and didn't say a word.
So when I left for the office,
I felt pretty low and somewhat despondent.

As I walked into my office,
my secretary Jane said,
"Good Morning Boss,
and by the way Happy Birthday! "
It felt a little better that at least someone had remembered.

I worked until one o'clock,
when Jane
knocked on my door
and said, "You know,
It's such a beautiful day outside,
and it is your Birthday,
what do you say we go out to lunch,
just you and me."
I said, "Thanks, Jane,
that's the greatest thing
I've heard all day.
Let's go!"

We went to lunch.
But we didn't go
where we normally would go.
She chose instead a quiet bistro
with a private table.
We had two martinis each
and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.
On the way back to the office,
Jane said, "You know,
It's such a beautiful day...
We don't need to go straight back to the office, Do We ?"

I responded,
"I guess not. What do you have in mind?"
She said, "Let's drop by my apartment,
it's just around the corner."

After arriving at her apartment,
Jane turned to me and said,
" Boss, if you don't mind,
I'm going to step into the bedroom
for just a moment.
I'll be right back."
"Ok," I
nervously replied.

She went into the bedroom and,
after a couple of minutes,
she came out carrying a huge birthday cake .
Followed by my wife, my kids,
and dozens of my friends and co-workers, all singing "Happy
Birthday.

And I just sat there...

On the couch...

Naked.
 
OMG THAT is the funniest thing ive heard all day.She was beig really nice your the one that got the wrong idea! Plus look at the bright side atlease her and your wife didn't plan on you going to her apartment and doing something wrong and her tell your wife or had your wife in a closet watching or something so, i think youd did the wrong thing , You should bring her back.
 
tjobeid---OMG THAT is the funniest thing ive heard all day.She was beig really nice your the one ..."


Wow, how could you mistake the title, the style it was written in, and the paragraphing for a real story? Time to delete your screen name and start anew. :confused:
 
If you can't say something nice...

OMG THAT is the funniest thing ive heard all day.She was beig really nice your the one that got the wrong idea! Plus look at the bright side atlease her and your wife didn't plan on you going to her apartment and doing something wrong and her tell your wife or had your wife in a closet watching or something so, i think youd did the wrong thing , You should bring her back.

Wow. Seriously, wow. I mean, wow. What else can I say? Just wow.
 
haha... great story.... haha...

and even greater response to story... haha.. :tongue:
 
Good one!

OMG THAT is the funniest thing ive heard all day.She was beig really nice your the one that got the wrong idea! Plus look at the bright side atlease her and your wife didn't plan on you going to her apartment and doing something wrong and her tell your wife or had your wife in a closet watching or something so, i think youd did the wrong thing , You should bring her back.

Dude, are you from Lithuania?
 
daar moest ik dan wel om lachen :biggrin:
 
Good one!



Dude, are you from Lithuania?


Not even close. :tongue:

Hes from Lebanon. Seriously.

lebanon.gif
 
Hay wait a second................................................................................. You basterds! lol i thought something was fishy about this story being written like that.:biggrin:
 
Hay wait a second................................................................................. You basterds! lol i thought something was fishy about this story being written like that.:biggrin:

:eek: :biggrin: :tongue:
 
Hay wait a second................................................................................. You basterds! lol i thought something was fishy about this story being written like that.:biggrin:

haha.... sorry... a little too late to say you KNEW something was up :tongue:
 
tjobeid---OMG THAT is the funniest thing ive heard all day.She was beig really nice your the one ..."


Wow, how could you mistake the title, the style it was written in, and the paragraphing for a real story? Time to delete your screen name and start anew. :confused:

This character could change his name once a week and we would still be able to ID him. He is apparently lacking an organ at the top of his brain stem :eek:.
 
OMG THAT is the funniest thing ive heard all day.She was beig really nice your the one that got the wrong idea! Plus look at the bright side atlease her and your wife didn't plan on you going to her apartment and doing something wrong and her tell your wife or had your wife in a closet watching or something so, i think youd did the wrong thing , You should bring her back.

Oh come on guys, give him a break. I am sure I was a little gullible when I was 17 too. :wink: However tjobeid, you have got to stop using your computer keyboard when you are wearing boxing gloves. :smile: Spell check can be your friend if you let him in.

Plus look at the bright side atlease her and your wife didn't plan on you going to her apartment and doing something wrong and her tell your wife or had your wife in a closet watching or something so, i think youd did the wrong thing , You should bring her back.

You may want to call his cousin Grammar check too because that is the longest sentence I have ever seen.:biggrin:
 
a read the dolphin post and got :frown:

then i had to re-read this post to get :biggrin:
 
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