I can twist both my thumbs to face the opposite way, without the aid of another hand...
I can identify any car anywhere...
I play guitar like a champ but don't make money doing it so....
I speak several languages but find myself mostly using the curse words...
I can write with both hands....
I can do impersonations and accents. I always talk like Barney when I'm drunk at the bar and I also yell out an authentic "Giggity Goo" when in vicinity of hot females...
I can put together my puzzle rings with only one hand...
I am full of useless information about history, physics, math, geography, geology, space, religion, time and porn....
I'm a good painter...
And lastly...
When I put water up my nose I can squirt it out my eye...
Between that last one and my thumb thing, I am one goofy mofo!