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delete
- Thread starter bangbang001
- Start date
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- 1 September 2001
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- Joined
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<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/sWS-FoXbjVI&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/sWS-FoXbjVI&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>
- Joined
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- Joined
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Add "&fmt=18" to the end of the address string of a youtube video and you will call up the higher quality audio version, if one exists. Example below.
The Bee Tells - Pot of Naked Fog [Beatles Mashup]
normal version:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ejQk9gGNxJA
16-bit stereo version:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ejQk9gGNxJA&fmt=18
The Bee Tells - Pot of Naked Fog [Beatles Mashup]
normal version:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ejQk9gGNxJA
16-bit stereo version:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ejQk9gGNxJA&fmt=18
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Victoria Osteen victimized by Satan,...(but I victimized her first;-)
"Lakewood generated $76 million in revenue, which amounts to just over $1,600 for every member of its congregation. Its take includes $44 million donated directly by congregants, who are asked to give 10 percent of their gross income; $10 million in product sales and sermon tapes; and $13 million brought in through direct-mail solicitations, up from about $6 million two years ago. The church’s greatest expense is the TV airtime it buys: $22 million last year to broadcast the show in more than 100 markets, a 10 percent annual increase in spending that is easy to justify. “Cutting back on airtime would be like saying we won’t be sending any trucks to deliver our product,” Comes says. An additional $13 million goes to administrative costs and salaries, and $9 million a year is spent on facilities and maintenance."
The boardgame:
http://www.boardgames.com/joosgayobeli.html
"Lakewood generated $76 million in revenue, which amounts to just over $1,600 for every member of its congregation. Its take includes $44 million donated directly by congregants, who are asked to give 10 percent of their gross income; $10 million in product sales and sermon tapes; and $13 million brought in through direct-mail solicitations, up from about $6 million two years ago. The church’s greatest expense is the TV airtime it buys: $22 million last year to broadcast the show in more than 100 markets, a 10 percent annual increase in spending that is easy to justify. “Cutting back on airtime would be like saying we won’t be sending any trucks to deliver our product,” Comes says. An additional $13 million goes to administrative costs and salaries, and $9 million a year is spent on facilities and maintenance."
The boardgame:
http://www.boardgames.com/joosgayobeli.html
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- 1 September 2001
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The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a surrogate father to start their family. On the day the surrogate father was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife and said, "I'm off. The man should be here soon"
Half an hour later, just by chance a door-to-door baby photographer rang the doorbell, hoping to make a sale.
"Good morning, madam. I've come to...."
"Oh, no need to explain. I've been expecting you," Mrs. Smith cut in.
"Really?" the photographer asked. "Well, good. I've made a speciality of babies"
"That's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a seat"
After a moment, she asked, blushing, "Well, where do we start?"
"Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the couch and perhaps a couple on the bed. Sometimes the living room floor is fun too; you can really spread out!"
"Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work for Harry and me"
"Well, madam, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But, if we try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven different angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results"
"My, that's a lot of....." gasped Mrs. Smith.
"Madam, in my line of work, a man must take his time. I'd love to be in and out in five minutes, but you'd be disappointed with that, I'm sure"
"Don't I know it," Mrs. Smith said quietly.
The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his baby pictures."This was done on the top of a bus in downtown London"
"Oh my God!" Mrs. Smith exclaimed, tugging at her handkerchief.
"And these twins turned out exceptionally well, when you consider their mother was so difficult to work with"
"She was difficult?" asked Mrs. Smith.
"Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to Hyde Park to get the job done right. People were crowding around four and five deep, pushing to get a good look"
"Four and five deep?" asked Mrs. Smith, eyes widened in amazement.
"Yes," the photographer said, "And for more than three hours too. The mother was constantly squealing and yelling. I could hardly concentrate. Then darkness approached and I began to rush my shots. Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just packed it all in."
Mrs. Smith leaned forward. "You mean squirrels actually chewed on your, um......equipment?"
"That's right. Well, madam, if you're ready, I'll set up my tripod so we can get to work."
"Tripod?????"
"Oh yes, I have to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too big for me to hold for very long. Madam? Madam? ....... Good Lord, she's fainted!!"
Half an hour later, just by chance a door-to-door baby photographer rang the doorbell, hoping to make a sale.
"Good morning, madam. I've come to...."
"Oh, no need to explain. I've been expecting you," Mrs. Smith cut in.
"Really?" the photographer asked. "Well, good. I've made a speciality of babies"
"That's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a seat"
After a moment, she asked, blushing, "Well, where do we start?"
"Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the couch and perhaps a couple on the bed. Sometimes the living room floor is fun too; you can really spread out!"
"Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work for Harry and me"
"Well, madam, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But, if we try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven different angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results"
"My, that's a lot of....." gasped Mrs. Smith.
"Madam, in my line of work, a man must take his time. I'd love to be in and out in five minutes, but you'd be disappointed with that, I'm sure"
"Don't I know it," Mrs. Smith said quietly.
The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his baby pictures."This was done on the top of a bus in downtown London"
"Oh my God!" Mrs. Smith exclaimed, tugging at her handkerchief.
"And these twins turned out exceptionally well, when you consider their mother was so difficult to work with"
"She was difficult?" asked Mrs. Smith.
"Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to Hyde Park to get the job done right. People were crowding around four and five deep, pushing to get a good look"
"Four and five deep?" asked Mrs. Smith, eyes widened in amazement.
"Yes," the photographer said, "And for more than three hours too. The mother was constantly squealing and yelling. I could hardly concentrate. Then darkness approached and I began to rush my shots. Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just packed it all in."
Mrs. Smith leaned forward. "You mean squirrels actually chewed on your, um......equipment?"
"That's right. Well, madam, if you're ready, I'll set up my tripod so we can get to work."
"Tripod?????"
"Oh yes, I have to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too big for me to hold for very long. Madam? Madam? ....... Good Lord, she's fainted!!"
- Joined
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- 4,123
- Joined
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- Messages
- 4,123
A redneck was stopped by a game warden recently with two ice chests of fish. He was leaving a cove well known for its fishing.
The game warden asked the man, “Do you have a license to catch those fish?”
“Naw, sir, I ain’t got none of them there licenses, no. You must understand these here are my pet fish.”
“Pet fish?” said the game warden.
“Ya. Every night I take these here fish down to da lake and let them swim ’round for a while. Then I whistle and they jump rat back into this here ice chest and I take them home.”
“That’s a bunch of hooey! Fish can’t do that!” says the warden.
The redneck looked at the game warden for a moment and then said, “It’s the truth Mr. Government man, I’ll show you. It really works.”
“Okay,” said the game warden, ” I’ve GOT to see this! And if it doesn’t work I am going to throw the book at you.”
The redneck poured the fish into the lake and stood and waited.
After several minutes, the game warden turned to him and said, “Well?”
“Well, what?” said the redneck.
The warden said, “When are you going to call them back?”
The redneck said, “Call who back?”
“The FISH!” replied the warden.
“What fish?” answered the redneck.
The game warden asked the man, “Do you have a license to catch those fish?”
“Naw, sir, I ain’t got none of them there licenses, no. You must understand these here are my pet fish.”
“Pet fish?” said the game warden.
“Ya. Every night I take these here fish down to da lake and let them swim ’round for a while. Then I whistle and they jump rat back into this here ice chest and I take them home.”
“That’s a bunch of hooey! Fish can’t do that!” says the warden.
The redneck looked at the game warden for a moment and then said, “It’s the truth Mr. Government man, I’ll show you. It really works.”
“Okay,” said the game warden, ” I’ve GOT to see this! And if it doesn’t work I am going to throw the book at you.”
The redneck poured the fish into the lake and stood and waited.
After several minutes, the game warden turned to him and said, “Well?”
“Well, what?” said the redneck.
The warden said, “When are you going to call them back?”
The redneck said, “Call who back?”
“The FISH!” replied the warden.
“What fish?” answered the redneck.
- Joined
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Tupac is alive? Gunned down in front of the "LUXUR" hotel?
<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/U0xfWYvwLO8&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/U0xfWYvwLO8&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>
<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/U0xfWYvwLO8&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/U0xfWYvwLO8&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>
I don't read the script, the script reads me!
John McCain and Barack Obama somehow ended up at the same
barbershop. As they sat there, each being worked on by a
different barber, not a word was spoken. The barbers were
even afraid to start a conversation for fear it would turn
to politics.
As the barbers finished their shaves, the one who had Obama
in his chair reached for the aftershave.
Obama was quick to stop him saying, 'No thanks, my wife
Michelle will smell that and think I've been in a
whorehouse.'
The second barber turned to McCain and said, 'How about
you?'
McCain replied, 'Go ahead; my wife doesn't know what the
inside of a whorehouse smells like.'
barbershop. As they sat there, each being worked on by a
different barber, not a word was spoken. The barbers were
even afraid to start a conversation for fear it would turn
to politics.
As the barbers finished their shaves, the one who had Obama
in his chair reached for the aftershave.
Obama was quick to stop him saying, 'No thanks, my wife
Michelle will smell that and think I've been in a
whorehouse.'
The second barber turned to McCain and said, 'How about
you?'
McCain replied, 'Go ahead; my wife doesn't know what the
inside of a whorehouse smells like.'
- Joined
- 16 April 2007
- Messages
- 1,783
And now, the knitted Ferarri can be yours:
http://www.jokeroo.com/funnypictures/knitted_ferrari.html
http://video.yahoo.com/watch/3345410/9384501
http://www.jokeroo.com/funnypictures/knitted_ferrari.html
http://video.yahoo.com/watch/3345410/9384501
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