Yeah finding the right woman can be tough, but Man I wouldnt want to be single agian for nuthin, I have worked with guys that say stuff like "I'm not stupid I'm a bachlor" or "100% of all divorces start with marrage" and crap like that, I just feel sad for them, cuz they can't grow up and figure out how to live with someone as a team and choose someone that they can give unselfishly to and get the same back......The best advise i ever got was that "Most failed marrages are caused by one or both persons being selfish and placing their needs above the other persons"....just my 3.5 cents ..JZ
what the hell is wrong with people
- Thread starter jdc1687
- Start date
Deuce B said:Have a friend of yours call her number and see if she answers. He can just play it off with the "sorry, wrong number" routine. Then you can call shortly after and see if she just doesn't pick up YOUR calls. Easy enough.
You must be a landlord like me. I have used the above method to contact deadbeat tenants on many occasions.
The two-call rule is a good one. But, I've been implementing a one-call rule.
If I call them and leave a message, I do not call back. No point in it.
The bottom line is that the dating scene sucks. This is why people will enter into marriages with those for whom a nasty divorce is of high foreseeable probability. But, I digress.
Women do all kinds of crazy sh!t. Expecting them to be courteous, polite, respectful, or accountable in any manner is foolhardy. They will just do whatever they feel like. Hanging up on you after "hey" is not that extraordinary.
Playing hard to get tends to work. Being nice *can* set you up for getting sh!t on. But, if you're looking for a keeper, be nice to her. If she's nice back, you have something. If she plays games, lies, whatever else, then she's not a keeper. If you just want to get a girl, play games with her. If you have sex, most definitely do not call until a couple days later. Don't send flowers, no gifts, nothing. She may become very insecure and interested in not being the one to get dumped. Then, you have the high ground and can extract surplus.
Dating is almost more a game of oneupsmanship anymore than it is about meeting people. It's about getting what you want and trying to sh!t on the other person or screw them over first, kind of like reality TV shows where you can backstab your friends to get ahead.
Sometimes, failure to return calls may be completely innocent. Perhaps she was kidnapped by aliens or fell into a sudden coma. With one girl, it wasn't that she wasn't calling me back, she was busy procuring drugs for her benzo addiction that I was unaware of. So, I was not actually being rejected.
The bottom line is to never take what any woman says to you at face value. It's meaningless.
As for hot women, they're great. Wouldn't be seen with any other type. But, yes, they demand maintenance. But, so do I! I ain't Ward Cleaver anymore than they are June. But, we all drive expensive cars here so we can afford it. You can get very far acting just aloof all the time, but you may piss off the few interested actually nice girls you meet. This is the risk.
Just be cool. Women dig cool.
If a girl proves herself to be a game player, you have two choices. First is you can forget about her and not waste your time. Second is that you can try to get back at her. To do #1, just ignore her and forget about her. Erase her number. If she asks why you didn't call, you can use the "I moved on" approach or you can even be MORE jackassed and say "oh, I lost your number." Or you can even pretend to have forgotten who they even are. Who cares if they don't like it, cuz they were the ones who didn't call back in the first place. Women, ESPECIALLY hot ones, are used to getting anything they want when and how they want it and there are abundant guys out there who never check them and give them exactly what they expect. So, being blunt may be a turnoff to them, but who cares, if you're in #1 mode? I find that reminding them that you DID call can inspire the "that's right, buster, you DID call and I didn't call back" mode where they may be inclined to gloat. Reminding a girl that she previously rejected you is a bad idea. "Was I supposed to?" is a better response.
If you're in #2 mode, do whatever you can to hit that @ss and then quit it just as quickly. The more abrupt the transition, the higher your revenge factor. Invest no feelings in them, tolerate whatever, but remain in the loop until you can get them on a night where your number is up and they are drunk. Then, be maximally pushy to get what you want, pimp player, whatever you gotta do and then make sure they go home immediately following, no sleepovers. Then, don't call. If you want a booty call girl, maybe call her the next weekend night or call her when you're interested in a piece and never any other time and don't take her calls under any circumstances.
If I call them and leave a message, I do not call back. No point in it.
The bottom line is that the dating scene sucks. This is why people will enter into marriages with those for whom a nasty divorce is of high foreseeable probability. But, I digress.
Women do all kinds of crazy sh!t. Expecting them to be courteous, polite, respectful, or accountable in any manner is foolhardy. They will just do whatever they feel like. Hanging up on you after "hey" is not that extraordinary.
Playing hard to get tends to work. Being nice *can* set you up for getting sh!t on. But, if you're looking for a keeper, be nice to her. If she's nice back, you have something. If she plays games, lies, whatever else, then she's not a keeper. If you just want to get a girl, play games with her. If you have sex, most definitely do not call until a couple days later. Don't send flowers, no gifts, nothing. She may become very insecure and interested in not being the one to get dumped. Then, you have the high ground and can extract surplus.
Dating is almost more a game of oneupsmanship anymore than it is about meeting people. It's about getting what you want and trying to sh!t on the other person or screw them over first, kind of like reality TV shows where you can backstab your friends to get ahead.
Sometimes, failure to return calls may be completely innocent. Perhaps she was kidnapped by aliens or fell into a sudden coma. With one girl, it wasn't that she wasn't calling me back, she was busy procuring drugs for her benzo addiction that I was unaware of. So, I was not actually being rejected.
The bottom line is to never take what any woman says to you at face value. It's meaningless.
As for hot women, they're great. Wouldn't be seen with any other type. But, yes, they demand maintenance. But, so do I! I ain't Ward Cleaver anymore than they are June. But, we all drive expensive cars here so we can afford it. You can get very far acting just aloof all the time, but you may piss off the few interested actually nice girls you meet. This is the risk.
Just be cool. Women dig cool.
If a girl proves herself to be a game player, you have two choices. First is you can forget about her and not waste your time. Second is that you can try to get back at her. To do #1, just ignore her and forget about her. Erase her number. If she asks why you didn't call, you can use the "I moved on" approach or you can even be MORE jackassed and say "oh, I lost your number." Or you can even pretend to have forgotten who they even are. Who cares if they don't like it, cuz they were the ones who didn't call back in the first place. Women, ESPECIALLY hot ones, are used to getting anything they want when and how they want it and there are abundant guys out there who never check them and give them exactly what they expect. So, being blunt may be a turnoff to them, but who cares, if you're in #1 mode? I find that reminding them that you DID call can inspire the "that's right, buster, you DID call and I didn't call back" mode where they may be inclined to gloat. Reminding a girl that she previously rejected you is a bad idea. "Was I supposed to?" is a better response.
If you're in #2 mode, do whatever you can to hit that @ss and then quit it just as quickly. The more abrupt the transition, the higher your revenge factor. Invest no feelings in them, tolerate whatever, but remain in the loop until you can get them on a night where your number is up and they are drunk. Then, be maximally pushy to get what you want, pimp player, whatever you gotta do and then make sure they go home immediately following, no sleepovers. Then, don't call. If you want a booty call girl, maybe call her the next weekend night or call her when you're interested in a piece and never any other time and don't take her calls under any circumstances.
Yeah that whole "nice guys finish last" thing is preatty true and it sucks too, The trick is to learn to be aloof and not a d!ckhead. when I met my wife I was soo sick of "dating" that I really didnt pay much attn to her, we went out and had fun but I didnt shower her with gifts and then her friends started calling me "booty call" then one day she said "eather I am going to be your girlfriend or I won't talk to you for a year" so I said "fine you can be my girlfriend" the rest is history.......so I guess my point is dont be a sucker but dont be an ass eather..JZ
docjohn said:
Doc, I didn't know that you went both ways, maybe you remember what Woody Allen said about being bisexual, " it doubles your chance for a date on Saturday nights" :wink:
liftshard has the book written on being a player! Maybe I should have read this before I got married. Actually, before I started dating my wife I was getting a rep as a player and could care less about most women I dated. BAM then she shows up and we did everything right. We actually took everything slow and hung out for a while, part of this is because she had a 5 yo and was cautious. I guess my point is, when you meet a true keeper she won't play these lame a$$ games liftshard is talking about. If she plays games play her or walk. The good ones don't screw with your head.
ah, you mean before marriage, right?
Cairo94507 said:
You said it, brother. Lisa and I have been together since we were 17 y/o. In college, I felt sorry the single guys shelling out cash in hopes of meeting women and scoring. We got married after college, but getting married was one of the best things I ever did (sorry, had to insert the marriage plug - the old lady reads prime).
I always tell the single guys at the office: "Women don't want you unless they think other women want you". That means doing exactly what liftshard said - be cool, be aloof, BUT be sure to hang out with other women if you want the first one to start paying attention to you.
Then, one day when you add a wedding band on your finger along with your NSX, you will get more attention from women than you ever imagined.
I have about 15 commandments or so..seem to out fairly well, they are available for a price 
Dating is for chicks you are already having sex with. No exceptions. 
Ive had a few of those TFP dates before. I just smile it off and think about my next prospect!
TFP=Thanks For Playing
TFP=Thanks For Playing
zahntech said:
Ouch... should have just left after the first hour or two. Girls like that tend to think they're hot shit and guys will just want them regardless of the kind of bullshit pulled.
Because of stuff like that I don't date at all unless I know what kind of person they are. I guess one of the benefits of being a guitarist in a rock band is I've got no female selection shortage
Maybe she met someone with a newer NSX or her boyfriend was there. :biggrin:
nuccaJB said:liftshard has the book written on being a player! Maybe I should have read this before I got married. Actually, before I started dating my wife I was getting a rep as a player and could care less about most women I dated. BAM then she shows up and we did everything right. We actually took everything slow and hung out for a while, part of this is because she had a 5 yo and was cautious. I guess my point is, when you meet a true keeper she won't play these lame a$$ games liftshard is talking about. If she plays games play her or walk. The good ones don't screw with your head.
You got it. And, I am actually a nice guy. I don't like dating games. I despise this dating scene. I've had chicks with which there was a lot of potential screw things completely up because of the whole gamesmanship angle. And, I've done it too, just totally ruined a good thing because of desire to have the upper hand. Dating sucks.
Yes, if you are consistently a nice guy, you are going to get sh!t on very often. Why? Because most girls out there are a word that starts w/ C and rhymes with "blunts." Period. And, most the guys out there are solely sex-interested assholes who play the same type of games as the girls do. Oh yeah, and everybody does a lot of coke. All these things were revelations to me when I reentered the single scene after being in a 7 year relationship which included marriage and 2 children. But, now, I have amassed much wisdom. And one of my axioms now is "never trust a b!tch." A corollary is "we don't love them hoes."
Do I want it this way? No. But, take my latest gf for example. I was nice to her. Did shit slow. Kept my nose clean, squeaky. No games, no BS, no dating other women. I didn't want to do anything to screw it up because there was immense chemistry here. Waited for sex. Sent roses the next day. I mean, all stuff that girls claim to want, the to die for romance stuff.
What did I reap? She lied to me about her relationship with her longterm ex. Not once, not twice, every fking time I asked about it. And, really, I didn't care about him, it was a recent breakup and I understand it takes time to finally sever ties. I didn't expect that to happen overnight and was cool with being casual until she could sort things out. I asked her if she was in contact with him because I wanted to see if she'd tell the truth or lie. And, she lied. Every time. Eventually got busted. Another hot chick with Hot Chick Syndrome. One of the symptoms of HCS is refusal to accept accountability.
I do this with my kids, I ask them to test their truthfulness. And, sometimes - we all were kids - we lie because we think we're in trouble. That's what she did. And, so when you are nice, you risk spending money, being nice, casting pearls before swine. That's just the way it is out there. It's sad, but true.
And, girls do it too. I knew this girl a bit ago who was 25 and had already racked up like 30 or 40 sexual partners. And, she seemed depressed and sort of misguided. I was like, "the answer is easy, STOP putting out." Don't put out until you're married. Yeah, it sucks, you'll be alone alot and hoes use sex often as ersatz intimacy and guys make phonecalls and spend dough pretending that they have a real relationship. If you give yourself up easy, people will use you.
As I said before, be nice to a girl and if she's nice back, you have something. Girls should do the same thing. But, if you put out right away or mistake a player for a nice girl, you're going to get played.
I would call, if you reach her voice mail, this is what you say: "hey, this girl was talking about you the other day and she said ... *click*"
she will definately call back.
she will definately call back.
this thread is hillarious... I'm a youngin and am not married...
Look.. if you wanna pick up chics go to the local track and then find the local bars. Most areas around tracks are rural and are generally smaller towns. It generally starts something like this:
"Hi... etc."
"Oh what's the band on your arm."
"... oh i am at (track)."
sure she doesn't want you for you but hell... do whatcha gotta do and move on. Someone once said that you can't believe what a man says in a bar after 10pm. There may be a truth tot his... :wink:
Heh.. hands down it's like hunting neon deer w/ a uzi.
but I wouldn't know anything about that...... :tongue:
x
Look.. if you wanna pick up chics go to the local track and then find the local bars. Most areas around tracks are rural and are generally smaller towns. It generally starts something like this:
"Hi... etc."
"Oh what's the band on your arm."
"... oh i am at (track)."
sure she doesn't want you for you but hell... do whatcha gotta do and move on. Someone once said that you can't believe what a man says in a bar after 10pm. There may be a truth tot his... :wink:
Heh.. hands down it's like hunting neon deer w/ a uzi.
but I wouldn't know anything about that...... :tongue:
x
actually... who cares there are tons of women out there. get another. this one just disqualified herself. :wink: her loss right?
The key is to be self assured enough to know when it is their loss, and feel good about letting it go.
