Verry sad day today........

prova4re

prova4re

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8 May 2002
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In a Iglo
Someone died in my arms today.

I was stopped at a traffic light today, waiting to turn left when I saw a Semi truck plow into a Pt cruiser in front of me.
The truck pushed the car into a light pole and pined it there, about 10 feet from my car.
The truck was a local company, and I new the owner.
The driver of the truck was fine, and went to help the driver of the car,
I got out and ran to the car that was hit, the doors were pined shut on both sides.
So we had to smash the window to get in, there was a 70 year old lady that was slumped over the passenger seat.
I reached in to turn off the car that was smoking, and then tried to help her.
She was in bad shape, as I could not get a pulse from her neck so I tried her wrist but it was very faint.
She went into convulsions and garbed my hand, she was looking right at me.
I felt very helpless...............as I knew by looking at her injuries, there was nothing that I could do for her.

She let go of my hand, and let out a breath then she was gone.

Then a nurse and a doctor came up, so I backed away.
They looked at her and said there was nothing they could do.

I keep thinking about what happened, and can't sleep,
It makes me think twice about driving at all.

I was going to go on the Players Run again this year, but after all those crashes on the Gumball this year, and this crash, I don't think I want to go.
After all I have 2 kids to live for.
 
Life is such a fragile thing <B>prova4re</B>, and you just witnessed it. There was nothing you could do. Some people's worst fear is to die alone. But at least you were there for her. I hope you can find some comfort in that thought.

> <I>After all I have 2 kids to live for.</I>

That's right... you have to <U>live</U>. Maybe you want to make changes to your life, but please don't let this tragedy paralyse you. Seek counselling; talk to people close to you about it; pray. If it helps talking more about it here do so, but don't bottle up the emotions and let fear box you in. Life is too short to fear death.


My heart bleeds for you man; and I say all these words out of concern for you. I hope I'm not lecturing or sound harsh. That lady was very very fortunate to have you in her last moments. And what you did -- running up and holding her hand -- was very courageous. Many people would have been too scared to help. You did a very noble deed.

With upmost sincerity,
-mike
 
Wow. Sorry to hear about this. I commended you for running and trying to help. Not everyone would do such a thing.
 
Your efforts to assist should be honored, many people would not assist. Thank You
 
One of the most powerful posts I've read in a while. I'm at a loss for words...
 
REFLECTION

prova4re, you are a huge hero in my book. Via con Dios.

While it is a sad event, here is perhaps something to soothe your heart.

As Neo put it, some people's worst fears are dieing alone. You have solace in knowing that you were at that intersection for a reason, and that reason was for the old lady to not be alone at her time of passage. Her eyes said it “thank you, stranger”. Don't be sad. Be prouder than you were brave.
 
I think NeoNSX said it best: But at least you were there for her.

No doubt the emotional impact this left on you is huge now. It is to us who are reading your post.

But think of the comfort you offered her during the last minutes. I am sure she probably felt less pain and more at peace and comforted knowing that someone was there holding her hand, that she was not alone, that she was loved and she could let go. The emotional bonding you offered a complete stranger during a time of such need is a rare quality that many of us never live long enough or get the portunity to offer.

And live we must indeed. Take strength from this as you look at your kids, and teach them by example the higher morals of human kindness to one another.
 
I am so sorry to hear that. That is terrible, but thankful you were there for her when she died. Life is fragile, as NeoNsx said, so makes you think about your life and how important it is to really live each day like it is your last. Sorry to hear that.
 
Hey Brian,

There must be a God given reason for what had happen. I believe this is a "wake up call"not only for you but for all of us. I'm really moved on the way you've put your own life in harms way trying to save a total stranger.

WE'RE ALL PROUD OF YOU!!
 
Last edited:
Brian, you did all you could do and it was good that you were there. Many people would have just left it to the paramedics. Sorry you had to experience it but I agree with these other guys, your just being there brought comfort to someone's last moments. You did the right thing. Go spend time with your family.
 
I can't add anything more to what everyone has already said. You did the honorable thing that mankind can do for another human. I'm sure that the person's family would be grateful if they knew that you were there for their loved one at the time of her death.
 
Sorry to hear of this awful tragedy, Brian. I know it hits close to home, especially for those of us that are sports car enthusiasts. It sounds like the experience has already caused you to reevaluate some priorities, which may not necessarily be a bad thing, but don't let it keep you from enjoying life--and pursuing your passions. Hang in there, hopefully somehow you'll find the strength to deal with the emotional aftereffects.

At least this lady lived to a relatively ripe age of 70. Instead of focusing on the horrible way it ended, perhaps it might help if you were to find out how she lived her life, and what she accomplished during her time on this world. That way, at least you'll have something positive to think about when you think of her.

Good luck..
 
I am so sorry that happened...for everybody involved. I wish there was something I could say to help you make some sense of it or figure it out. Truely sorry.:(
 
It pains me reading your post, Brian. Looks like we all learned a profound lesson from your experience. For the rest of us, we may not remember this thread in a few months, but some of us may just do things a little differently from now on.

With 2 young ones, I'm in a similar situation as you. I may not blast through canyon twisties like I did before, but I still manage to enjoy my car in a more controlled environment. Like many have said, we shouldn't stop doing all the things that we love, instead, may be we can do it more wisely.

Her passing may remind us that life is fragile, it also reminded us that life is short and precious. So we should enjoy it responsibly.

When people say that things happen for a reason. I used to say "BS, wait till it happens to you". At this moment, I just have to selfishly say that learned something from your experience and I thank you! I tip my hat to you for your willingness to lend a helping hand.

God bless!
 
Brian, Don't feel bad. Think about why you are here. I think you already figured it out. Some unlucky people spend their whole lives never getting it.

Bravo!

MikeC
 
Re: REFLECTION

AndyVecsey said:
prova4re, you are a huge hero in my book. Via con Dios.

While it is a sad event, here is perhaps something to soothe your heart.

As Neo put it, some people's worst fears are dieing alone. You have solace in knowing that you were at that intersection for a reason, and that reason was for the old lady to not be alone at her time of passage. Her eyes said it “thank you, stranger”. Don't be sad. Be prouder than you were brave.
Click to expand...

I'm with Neo, Andy and everyone else.
Rest well my friend. Reality is a monster sometimes, but it also can make you appreciate your own blessings that much more.
 
I feel for you

I had a good friend die a year ago. He taught me how to rock climb. He was a great friend. I think about what his life could have been.

Life is a precious. The time you spend with loved ones are valuable moments.
I hope she had a full life with no regrets. I hope to remember the relationships I had with people when I pass away.

Brian
 
Thanks to Neo, and everyone for your support.

I am no hero, I use to be a volunteer fire fighter when I was younger, so its just natural to get involved.
I have seen my fair share of people who had passed away, that has never bothered me too much.

But this case was different, I was there when it happened and saw it all, and there was still nothing I could do.

The RCMP came over today to take my statement,he said the truck was not at fault.
The lady was waiting to turn left, and for some reason ran the red light, right into the path of the truck.
It was raining and starting to get dark out when it happened.

Even more sad.
The police told me she took care of her disabled grandson, as his parents had passed a few years ago.
 
I had a very similar situation happen to me about twenty years ago. It stayed with me for many years after. I would think about the traumatic experience on a daily basis. Often it would bring me to tears thinking about it. I still think about that day at least once a week. I was unable to pull the gentleman from his vehicle and he was burned alive right before my eyes. There were at least ten other bystanders and not one of them would help me because they thought his car would blow up because of the fire. The only good that came out of that day was I did save a women and her baby from the other vehicle that was involved in the accident. Why wouldn't anybody help me? That still eats at me to this day. The guy was 30 years old with a wife and three kids. The vehicle never did explode. If you want to pm me about how you are feeling feel free to. I ended up going for some therapy to deal with what happened that day.
 
WOW!
That is sad, You did a great thing to help those people out.

The thing that made me mad was, I parked my car with the flashers on and there was some guy behind me beeping to let him by.
There were 20 or so cars at that intersection, that kept driving.
2 guys jumped the curb so they could get passed the truck, and slowed down to look when they got close.
 
As everyone mentioned above,

and it reaffirms your life and the fragility of it in general. Some one was there for her and it was you, thank you as a person for doing something in a world where everybody is increasingly out for themselves.

:)
 

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