OT: Why do wives/fiances/girlfriends dislike your NSX?

[huckster]

nsxtasy said it already.

brother, as an ex-therapist, let me tell you that danger lies that way. my wife has plenty of reasons to exculpate me but the bottomline is always that we love each other and we are a team.

my wife married me knowing full well who i am, and understanding that i will want to do/buy things that piss her off. what you have alluded to in your post is a powerstruggle, and you'd better deal with that before you go any further. at the end of the day, everybody had better feel good about the decision, whatever that is.

good luck with this.

 

[huckster]

if you want a more honest opinion, give us more info about yourself--kids,, age, etc.

also about your wife.

love is one thing, control is a different beast altogether. i cant imagine my wife even talking to me about what i would drive for work. if i came home(which i have) and told her what i bought or would buy for work she would never hassle me about that. i actually brought my escalade home with no warning and she only said 'well, if that's what you want to run around in for work'.

good luck,and let us know.

 

[1HOT NSX]

It sounds to me like you've won the power struggle in your home - she agrees to most of what you want. We do have a different situation in our lives, we must compromise with our wives, and they won't say "yes honey" do whatever you want. It's all about money and priorities. Where do you draw the line? She wants a million dollar house when you think your 500k dollar house is just fine for the two of you. She thinks your 80k dollar car is a waste of money when a Ford Taurus would do just fine for us - see where I'm getting to? It's all about perspective, what's important and what's not - that's the bottom line. And yes, if you have the power to convince your wife that what you want is the best for her and the family too, then more power to you!

 

[TigerNSX]

Originally posted by 1HOT NSX:
It sounds to me like you've won the power struggle in your home - she agrees to most of what you want. We do have a different situation in our lives, we must compromise with our wives, and they won't say "yes honey" do whatever you want. It's all about money and priorities. Where do you draw the line? She wants a million dollar house when you think your 500k dollar house is just fine for the two of you. She thinks your 80k dollar car is a waste of money when a Ford Taurus would do just fine for us - see where I'm getting to? It's all about perspective, what's important and what's not - that's the bottom line. And yes, if you have the power to convince your wife that what you want is the best for her and the family too, then more power to you!

I agree with you. I feel quite bad that I may have described my wife as a control freak. In reality, she is a very sweet and loving person (she's looking what I am writing right now... just kidding). It's just that we have a different perspective exactly as 1HOTNSX said. She is almost getting sick and tired of me keep on trading in cars. We are in the late twenties, and we do not plan to have kids for the next three years. We are both extremely busy during the week. The trouble is that she doesn't understand why I want to sell a beutiful 740 for something that is already 10 years old. She told me that she wouldn't mind if I were to get something newer, say 2000 NSX (She thinks that trading in 740 for 2000 NSX is a even trade in $ wise). In other words, she thinks that I am trading in my car for something worse that what I have at an equal price. Nevertheless, I can't afford that much (97+ NSX is above my budget), and I don't want to take a loan just for that (only if my 740 didn't depreciate so much could this have come true). I guess that this is sort of a problem for any non-car-enthusiasts. They all think that I am doing something crazy, and I don't agree. My 740 keeps depreciating, and the longer I wait, the harder I will be able to cleaner NSX.

 

[5inchfatlip]

I would say buy it regardless...I believe she should love you for who you are...and part of that is a "car" person...at least she should try to understand that this is part of your desire in life, not that its more important than her though...buy the car, then deal with it...dont let someone keep you from fullfilling your dreams (dunno if the NSX is your dream) but you know what I mean....especially being your wife she should understand...

 

[Joel]

Just my opinion but I may have a simple solution to the "materialistic possession" issue.

Owners who see the NSX as a passion will undoubtedly run into some friction with the fairer sex because of the 'attention' thing. Women like to be cherished and seeing that some of that is being "taken" away from her because of a car. Unless she COMPLETELY understands, you will most certainly see this "jealousy" (however mild or severe) manifested is one way or another. I'm projecting that my GF will show some of that behavior because of the amount of time I will be spending on the details of the car (when I get it).

I've already thought about this and in my case, I've thought of a solution. See, I'm thinking that women don't like the car because they feel directly detached from it and, in turn, indirectly detached from you (when your attention is on the car). There's a triangle of relationships here that she might not feel comfortable with. Like someone said in a different thread, they sort of feel like there's a mistress involved.

So what's the solution? Make her feel that she's somehow attached to the car. That she's somehow related to the NSX. How? Well, you ever see yacht owners name their precious boats (usually with a female name)?

Name your car after her! Get a small sticker of her name and attached it somewhere in the car! Or if you were so bold to do so, get your license plate personalized with her name on it! If not, even on a license plate frame will do.

Doing this will address a few of these issues:

1. She would feel honored that you named your car after her.

2. Taking care of your car well would make her feel that you would take as much time (even moreso) into taking care of her.

3. When she gets to drive or ride in the car, she would feel good because everyone will see her name written all over it.

4. And the issue of using the car to pick up women? If girls do come up to you, just point at the car where her name is stamped. Your wife or gf will be rest assured that whoever makes an attempt would know ahead of time that you are already taken.

In my case, when I get my car in a few weeks (YEY!), I told her that she would be the first one to see it and the first one to ride in it with me. Then she broke out a big smile and gave me a warm hug. I can tell she REALLY appreciate that I said that because right then and there, I let her KNOW that she is still first priority in my book.

Easy.

 

[Joel]

Oh, one more thing.

A friend of mine just purchased a nice looking boxster. He's already telling me stories of how he gets looks--especially from women. He admitted that a few had already tried.

He's a very devoted husband and father and I don't even question his integrity. So I asked him how does your wife deal with it?

Instead of telling me, he took me around back where the car was parked and pointed at the licens plate frame. It said:

"Happily married with four kids"

I just smiled and gave him a nod.

 

[TigerNSX]

Originally posted by Joel:
Name your car after her! Get a small sticker of her name and attached it somewhere in the car! Or if you were so bold to do so, get your license plate personalized with her name on it! If not, even on a license plate frame will do.

I love this!!! That sounds like an excellent plan. I am so excited to tell her about this now.

 

[5inchfatlip]

ok one more time-----buy it...its your choice..your lifelong mate should be able to deal with this...

 

[nsxtasy]

Originally posted by 1HOT NSX:
Where do you draw the line? She wants a million dollar house when you think your 500k dollar house is just fine for the two of you.

Originally posted by 1HOT NSX:
It's all about perspective

The perspective from the middle of the country is that only someone from Northern California would use those particular dollar amounts for a housing price analogy.

 

[nsxtasy]

Originally posted by Joel:
Make her feel that she's somehow attached to the car.

Excellent point. Make her feel that she's attached - and definitely, not threatened.

The license plate frame idea is one way. The nickname idea is another.

Another way is to involve her in your car activities. Join the NSX Club of America and bring her to club activities. There will be other members who also bring their SOs. Some are interested in the cars, and others commiserate among themselves how crazy we are in our devotion to the car - but in either case, she will see that (a) she is not alone in this situation, and (b) your passion for the car does not represent any diminution of your feelings for her, and instead provides an avenue in which she can participate in your enjoyment of the car.

BTW, another point for your particular case - tell her you want an older NSX (rather than a newer one) because it's much less likely to incur the catastrophic depreciation you've experienced with your Bimmer.

[This message has been edited by nsxtasy (edited 01 October 2002).]

 

[steveny]

Why do wives/fiances/girlfriends dislike your NSX?

50% of the time the reason is that The NSX may be used to get laid.
The other 50% of the reason could be that NSX will get more attention than the woman will. IMO

 

[Joel]

Originally posted by steveny:
Why do wives/fiances/girlfriends dislike your NSX?

50% of the time the reason is that The NSX may be used to get laid.
The other 50% of the reason could be that NSX will get more attention than the woman will. IMO

Only if the woman cares to be gawked at by ricers, I wouldn't worry to much about the second argument. Few people outside that circle would even know what the NSX is.

 

[caz-nsx]

I agree with nsxtacy. I got my 91 NSX back in July. My wife has accepted my love of cars. She thought the NSX was a nice toy but did not understand why I wanted the NSX so much. That all changed when we went to NSX NH 2002 a couple weeks ago. My wife and I got to meet other people (singles and couples) that have NSXs. She talked to other wives that have had to live with the NSX also. Since then she has been much more into the NSX. She wanted to go for a cruise last weekend. She even helped put on a coat of Zaino.

 

[jarryn]

My wife just wants a Suburban . . .

 

[5inchfatlip]

My GF last night got crazy on an onramp...hit the rev limiter-didnt even know..until the car started surging at redline...I said SHIFT!...

I use to tell her that she shifts to early and all the fun is after 6k RPM...so she replies you told me I shift to early!!!
haha...

 

[TigerNSX]

Things went well very smoothly with my wife, finally. She didn't say so, but I could tell that she sorta liked the idea of me putting a vanity plate. Now, the car that I was looking at was sold to a guy from a "dealer" yesterday!! I can't believe this. I guess that I wasn't meant to be the owner of that car

Nevertheless, I feel much better about the whole situation!!

 

[frunobulax]

i'm coming in a bit late here, but i just wanted to rub it in.

i've been wanting "a little honda" for several years, but living out of the country, moving here and there, blah, blah, blah, one excuse after another. when i told my wife i found an NSX that i liked, she said "if you really wanted it, you'd have it already". so i bought it.

when she sat in it the first time, she squealed (with delight). then, when i cranked the motor, she said "oh no you did NOT buy a car that sounds like that!" she was thoroughly impressed.

then i took her for a drive, and she squealed the whole way. then i let her drive it, and she scared the doo-doo outa me! she buried her foot in the loud pedal and didn't come up for air till we were over 100, which didn't take long.

then i remembered that she used to own a lotus esprit. and i wasn't scared any more.

i don't have to worry about her driving it a lot, because it doesn't have power steering. but she still loves me, and the car, and going fast.

one other point...i had to learn this the hard way, but i've learned it. for a very long time i worked 70-80 hours a week, and then wanted to spend time in my woodshop making furniture. my wife didn't like it much, even though the furniture was for her.

part of your wife's resentment may be that you work 70-80 hours a week, and then that you would like to spend time with your "little honda", instead of her. or maybe even WITH her, but she probably sees it as "either/or".

either way, you might try spending less time at work if that's possible. hey, i cut back to 60 hours a week and my wife thought she'd gone to heaven. if it's not possible then take an occasional day off JUST for her and you to spend together. DO the romance thing, wine, flowers, breakfast in bed, all that good stuff.

even if you don't get the car right away, you'll enjoy everything else a lot more.

but be sure to get the car.

------------------
dave
94 black/tan

 

[effer]

Originally posted by Tiger740:
1) She doesn't understand why I want to "downgrade" from a BMW to an Acura!!

The NSX is among the very few cars that have the power and the magic to hugely impress people who see it and feel it in a real encounter.

You did not mention if your wife ever saw an NSX in real?

Generally when people have the opportunity to see and touch this car they are very impressed.

And believe me, no pictures in any number will suffice; you have to see this car in real...to encounter the beauty face to face...

My GF finds my NSX superb and she's very proud to sit in this car, she really appreciate the quality of ride and the handling qualities of the car. She feels safe even though if I drive fast.

For sure she thinks that this is too much money for a car but she also knows that we enjoy a true exotic car...

My advice: buy it without any hesitation...

you only live once ( where NSXs are available! ) and I assume that she loves you...

effer

The NSX is the kind of car that can make women of any age and sportscar haters grin after a ride.

 

[Joel]

Originally posted by Tiger740:
Things went well very smoothly with my wife, finally. She didn't say so, but I could tell that she sorta liked the idea of me putting a vanity plate. Now, the car that I was looking at was sold to a guy from a "dealer" yesterday!! I can't believe this. I guess that I wasn't meant to be the owner of that car

Nevertheless, I feel much better about the whole situation!!

Tiger, just out of curiosity, where was this car that you were looking at? And why do you have the word dealer in ""?

 

[TigerNSX]

Thanks for your input again, guys.

"Tiger, just out of curiosity, where was this car that you were looking at? And why do you have the word dealer in ""?"

Oh, the car was located in Indiana. It was 94 blk/blk, and the car was sold to a dealer in Florida (I was informed). I used quotation mark since that was what the seller said (nothing specific about me having used "").

I am still looking, but now that everything is cool with my wife, and that I decided to look all over the US, I am in better boat. Now the only problem is that I have a project deadline in 2 weeks, and I pretty much lived in my office for past 3 weeks. This works out with my wife, though, since she is on call all the time (she is in medicine).

Now she tells me that if I am going to get one, I should go for red or yellow, and be extreme!!

 

[BostonNSX]

hey tiger 740.. where do u locate in Boston? Yellow is nice

I'm looking forward to have a blue, midnigh pearl, or yellow NSX targa

------------------
the art of chasing down my friend's white 3000gt at com. ave


NSXCA # 1690 "Sabrina"

[This message has been edited by BostonNSX (edited 19 October 2002).]

 

[huckster]

i vote for the yellow! (got a blk/blk). yellow looks reeeallly good. red is good to but man that yellow. a real eyepopper. red is also really much harder to maintain and shows imperfections much more.

anyway, CONGRATS!!! way to show her who's boss in your house! I'M in charge in MY house whenever she's outside.

 

[1HOT NSX]

Originally posted by Tiger740:
Nevertheless, I can't afford that much (97+ NSX is above my budget), and I don't want to take a loan just for that (only if my 740 didn't depreciate so much could this have come true) NSX.

If you want a yellow with factory paint then you'll have to go for a '97+ because that is the first year the yellow was offered. Red is beautiful too.

 

[tpearsall]

Just wait until she's out of town. "Easier to ask forgiveness than permission." (mostly kidding).

My wife tries hard to understand by car passions, but was bothered by the care I was giving to massaging leather conditioner into my Z3's seats. She really hates the NSX because she can't understand why I sold the convertible for a coupe and what's the benfit of a car that can go 80mph in 2nd gear.

She negotiated a 4th kid into my Z3 purchase, but not this time