The fuel pump 'control' relay is inside the main FI relay case. It is a two for one special! What Honda calls the fuel pump relay is actually the relay that by-passes the fuel pump resistor.
With a voltage tester, back-probe the black/red wire at the fuel pump resistor (just because it is easy to get to) and check for voltage between that point and ground while somebody turns the ignition key to the run position to initiate the prime pulse on the pump. If you get a short (approx. 2 sec) indication of 12 v and the pump does not run, sad to say that it looks like your pump might have died. If you don't get that 12 v pulse, then the first place I would look would be the main FI relay (go figure!). The relay may be actuating; but, as goldNSX states, you could have one of the infamous solder fractures on the connection to the pump. The main FI relay is not the only possible cause; but, if it is not the pump its the first place I would look.
Make sure that when you turn your key to run, that the dash lights including the all important MIL light are going through the test cycle. If the MIL light does not light up that indicates that there could be an ECU related problem (not likely; but, good to rule out).