Dear IRS ....
Dear Internal Revenue Service,
Enclosed you will find my 2007 tax return showing that I owe $3,407.00
in taxes.
Please note the attached article from the USA Today newspaper; dated 12
November, wherein you will see the Pentagon (Department of Defense) is
paying $171.50 per hammer and NASA has paid $600.00 per toilet seat.
I am enclosing four (4) toilet seats (valued @ $2,400) and six (6)
hammers (valued @ $1,029), which I secured at Home Depot, bringing my
total remittance to $3,429.00.
Please apply the overpayment of $22.00 to the 'Presidential Election
Fund,'
as noted on my return.
You can do this inexpensively by sending them one (1) 1.5" Phillips Head
screw (see aforementioned article from USA Today newspaper detailing how
H.U.D. pays $22.00 each for 1.5" Phillips Head Screws).
One screw is enclosed for your convenience.
It has been a pleasure to pay my tax bill this year, and I look forward
to paying it again next year.
Sincerely,
A Satisfied Taxpayer