Missouri Qwerks

KGP

Legendary Member
Joined
31 October 2001
Messages
3,583
Location
St. Louis, MO
For those of you who aren't from Missouri, I thought you might like to know a bit more about us. What's funny is this stuff is so true!

Growing up in Missouri:

1. You've never met any celebrities.

2. Everyone you know has been on a "Float Trip".

3."Vacation" means driving to Silver Dollar City,Worlds of Fun, or Six
Flags

4. You've seen all the biggest bands ten years AFTER they were popular.

5. You measure distance in minutes rather than miles. For example, "Well, Webb City's only 20 minutes away."

6. Down south to you means Arkansas.

7. The phrase "I'm going to the Lake this weekend" only means one thing.

8. You know several people who have hit a deer.

9. You think Missouri is spelled with an "ah" at the end (KC special).

10.Your school classes were canceled because of cold.

11.You know what "Party Cove" is.

12.Your school classes were canceled because of heat.

13.You instinctively ask someone you've just met, "What High School did you go to?"

14.You've had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.

15.You think ethanol makes your truck "run a lot better".

16.You know what's knee-high by the Fourth of July.

17.You see people wear bib overalls at funerals.

18.You see a car running in the parking lot at the store with no one in it,no matter what time of the year.

19.You knew in your heart that Mizzou can beat Nebraska in football.

20.You end your sentences with an unnecessary preposition. Example:
"Where's my coat at?"

21.All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable,or grain.

22.You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both
unlocked.

23.You think of the major four food groups as beef, pork, beer, and Jell-O salad with marshmallows.

24.You carry jumper cables in your car and know that everyone else should.

25.You went to skating parties as a kid.

26.You only own three spices: salt, pepper, and ketchup.

27.You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.

28.You think sexy lingerie is tube socks and a flannel nightie.

29.The local paper covers national and international headlines on, one
page, but requires six pages for sports.

30.You think I-44 is pronounced "farty-far." (St. Louis only.)

31.You'll pay for your kids to go to college unless they want to go to KU.

32.You think that "deer season" is a National Holiday.

33.You know that Concordia is halfway between Kansas City and Columbia, and Columbia is halfway between St. Louis and Kansas City, and the Warrenton Outlet Mall is halfway between Columbia and St. Louis.

34.You can't think of anything better than sitting on the porch in the
middle of the summer during a thunderstorm.

35.You know which leaves make good toilet paper.

36.You've said, "It's not the heat, it's the humidity."

37.You know all four seasons: Almost Summer, Summer (a.k.a. Construction),Still Summer and Football.

38.You know if another Missourian is from the Boot-heel, Ozarks, Eastern,or Western Missouri as soon as they open their mouth.

39.You know that Harry S Truman, Walt Disney and Mark Twain are all from Missouri.

40.You failed World Geography in school because you thought Cuba, Cairo,Milan, Versailles, California, Nevada, Paris, Houston, Cabool, Louisiana,Springfield, and Mexico were cities in Missouri. (And they are!)

41.You think a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor.

42.You know what "HOME OF THE THROWED ROLL" means.

43.You get this and send it to your Missouri friends.
 
you may want to add

1) You may believe that IMO's pizza is the greatest thing ever (including Provel Cheese)

2) You have no idea that your definition for the word 'hoosier' is completely unheard of in the rest of the civilized world.

3) You've only been to downtown because of sporting events, even though you live 3 miles away

4) You think 10 minutes of road congestion is 'Bad Traffic'

5) You have a big hole in your license plate, or have a paper one in the window because 'someone stole your registration tag'

6) If you see an NSX and ask if its the new honda Accord

7) You hate anyone from Chicago
 
Wow! Sounds like a great place to live...
 
Sounds pretty much like upstate NY. I am guilty of most of the list.

KGP said:
1. You've never met any celebrities.

Don't really care to.


KGP said:
5. You measure distance in minutes rather than miles. For example, "Well, Webb City's only 20 minutes away."

...and the destination is 35 miles away, reachable in 20 minutes because no one is in the way to slow you down.



KGP said:
7. The phrase "I'm going to the Lake this weekend" only means one thing.
I Can't think of a better place to spend the weekend!
KGP said:
8. You know several people who have hit a deer.
Better than hitting people I guess, at least you can't go to jail for running over a deer who runs out in front of you.





KGP said:
16.You know what's knee-high by the Fourth of July.

Corn, rows and rows of corn. I will take rows of corn over rows of houses anyday.



KGP said:
18.You see a car running in the parking lot at the store with no one in it,no matter what time of the year.
Less people=less theives!

KGP said:
22.You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both
unlocked.
So I can see when I go outside at night, late, with no worries of being accosted.

KGP said:
34.You can't think of anything better than sitting on the porch in the
middle of the summer during a thunderstorm.
No.... I can't.
 
Last edited:
Dtrigg said:
Wow! Sounds like a great place to live...

Ha, actually i lived in Raleigh for about 6 years, well until i moved to STL bout 1.5 years ago. :biggrin:
 
You should add another couple:

- You tease die hard Texans that they are actually not the original Texas in the US. Texas county Missouri was first and it's county seat is Houston - just as the founding fathers of Texas had set it up to be!

- You prefer frozen custard to ice cream (St. Louis / Ted Drews)

- You remember where you were when you heard "go crazy folks" (St. Louis)

- You remember the "Dick"-inger ump that made you world champions / blew the call depending which side of the state you are on.
 
KGP said:
11.You know what "Party Cove" is.

HAHA! I can't believe that made the list! "Havasu East" :)
 
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