Folks-
Let me tell you...........we've got the right guy running this Club!
As some of you know, I had the pleasure of hosting our beloved Pres., Larry B. at my home this weekend for the NSX Corral at Laguna Seca. The weekend was a blast, but could have easily been a disaster were it not for Larry B.! Picture this......."Ms. Purple", our Vice Pres., came over my place this afternoon to personally pick The Pres. up from my place in her awesome purple NSX........of course, and take them to the Acura VIP Dinner this evening in downtown Monterey. Well, while in the process of getting the luggage out the door, num-skull Nev (me) decided to close the door of the house behind me, (not recalling that part of the door lock system still stays locked unless manually unlocking it from the inside) as I was stepping out to lend a helping hand. So Larry B. decides to go back into the house to get some stuff still remaining, when,.........."Nev, you have the keys to the house, RIGHT?!"..............."AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA..........NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Then there was a deafening silence! Then, for some reason, I thought of The Don buying YET ANOTHER CAR!!! (NO, just kidding!) Now, the "hunt" was on!!! The Pres. began pressing his hands on each side of his head, pressing his hair back!..............Ms. Purple, went to get her cell phone, while I scooted to each window on the side of the house, looking for a chance,......a hope,......a miracle,.....heck, even a shovel.....ANYTHING THAT WOULD HAVE HELPED ME ENTER MY HOUSE.............but nothing! Back out the front of the house, The Pres., well, he was in "The Zone,"...........his eyes showing nystagmus, as the began the calculations, the trajectories, the apexes, and a billion other things that mere mortals couldn't even dream of! Just watching him ,"in action" was mesmerizing...........I was drenched with the brainstorming eminating from the man's eyes!!! Then for some reason, I thought of The Don again!............just kidding! Some how though, I knew, that I was in good hands, that somehow, something SPECIAL was about to happen! Then, as quickly as it all began,...............LARRY B., OUR FLIPPIN' LEADER..............WAS GONE!!!!!!!!!! NOWHERE TO BE SEEN! Ms. Purple and I looked at eachother, like lambs who've lost their way, hopelessly awaiting the Wolf to appear and seal our fate! Hopeless attempts of abviouisly lesser beings began, such as calling friends.............On a Sunday night.........for assistance (YEAH!), opening the garage door from the outide car's remote, KNOWING THAT I AM SO ANAL, THAT I WOULD NEVER LEAVE A DOOR UNLOCKED (obviously), crying.................whatever! Then, ..............like 'Ol Chris Cringle' flying down a chimney, the front door flew open, with The Pres. behind it!!! Our PRES., our LEADER, the one we all look up to, admire, "yada yada,".............had found a way to break into my home!!!!!!!!!!!!! (NO, A FULL "HOW TO" WILL NOT BE ON PRIME BY TOMORROW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) AND I WAS NEVER SO HAPPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH, THERE WAS CHEER, THERE WAS LAUGHTER, THERE WAS RELIEF, THERE WERE HUGS.......THERE WAS FRIGGIN' HAPPINESS FLYIN' ALL OVER THE PLACE...........as they would say in NY!!!
True, had it been Bob, he would have called a locksmith to come over, and while on his way over, looked him up in the Better Business Bureau, found out some good dirt on him, and after he finished the job, would have gotten me off with just a slap in the cann! If it had been Pete, he would have hopped into Ms. Purple's car and zoomed past my house so fast, that the immense vacuum from behind the car would have blown my door open! If it were Bailey, I'm sure he would have backed his car 2 feet from my door and cranked his Tubi to blow my door open....while hot babes came out from the passenger seat (ala the lambo. guys)! Should it have been The Don, he would have gotten on the cell, found a dealer who is now open in another part of the world, AND BOUGHT YET ANOTHER CAR..............though my door might still be locked.............but would that have mattered?.....NO, bacause as we all know, ...............IT IS STILL ALL ABOUT "THE DON!"............Or perhaps he would have whipped out his trombone and like an Indian Cobra dancer, blown some sweet tunes into the lock....lulling it to open..........but we likely would have still been out there.....sorry Don! If it were Doc John, he would have X-rayed the krap out of the lock, perhaps weakening the metal to the point that it would have just fallen off the door............but then I, and all beings in a 3 mile radius...........would essentially have been neutered.........thanks Doc.....but some things are more important that a locked door! Had it been Rog, I think that he would have respectfully asked Ms. Purple for her bra, and then placed it over the lock! Again, I am uncertain if that would have helped anything, but we all know Roger and his ongoing 'bra' thing!
In the end, all was well, and I owe Larry B., our Pres., yet another round of Thank You, THANK YOU AND THANK YOU!!!
SO, HOW EXACTLY DID HE GET IN???????........WELL, THAT'S OUR LITTLE SECRET! ..................................WHAT ARE YOU KIDDIN' ME.....................NO, DON'T SEND ME ANY HATE MAIL!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Larry, somehow found a back window that was not fully locked, stuck a credit card in, opened it up........then like Tarzan, swung into the house from the back, and like Hudini.........suprised the gaping- mouthed audience on the other side of the stage!
"LONG LIVE The PRES.!"
Cheers-
Nev
Let me tell you...........we've got the right guy running this Club!
As some of you know, I had the pleasure of hosting our beloved Pres., Larry B. at my home this weekend for the NSX Corral at Laguna Seca. The weekend was a blast, but could have easily been a disaster were it not for Larry B.! Picture this......."Ms. Purple", our Vice Pres., came over my place this afternoon to personally pick The Pres. up from my place in her awesome purple NSX........of course, and take them to the Acura VIP Dinner this evening in downtown Monterey. Well, while in the process of getting the luggage out the door, num-skull Nev (me) decided to close the door of the house behind me, (not recalling that part of the door lock system still stays locked unless manually unlocking it from the inside) as I was stepping out to lend a helping hand. So Larry B. decides to go back into the house to get some stuff still remaining, when,.........."Nev, you have the keys to the house, RIGHT?!"..............."AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA..........NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Then there was a deafening silence! Then, for some reason, I thought of The Don buying YET ANOTHER CAR!!! (NO, just kidding!) Now, the "hunt" was on!!! The Pres. began pressing his hands on each side of his head, pressing his hair back!..............Ms. Purple, went to get her cell phone, while I scooted to each window on the side of the house, looking for a chance,......a hope,......a miracle,.....heck, even a shovel.....ANYTHING THAT WOULD HAVE HELPED ME ENTER MY HOUSE.............but nothing! Back out the front of the house, The Pres., well, he was in "The Zone,"...........his eyes showing nystagmus, as the began the calculations, the trajectories, the apexes, and a billion other things that mere mortals couldn't even dream of! Just watching him ,"in action" was mesmerizing...........I was drenched with the brainstorming eminating from the man's eyes!!! Then for some reason, I thought of The Don again!............just kidding! Some how though, I knew, that I was in good hands, that somehow, something SPECIAL was about to happen! Then, as quickly as it all began,...............LARRY B., OUR FLIPPIN' LEADER..............WAS GONE!!!!!!!!!! NOWHERE TO BE SEEN! Ms. Purple and I looked at eachother, like lambs who've lost their way, hopelessly awaiting the Wolf to appear and seal our fate! Hopeless attempts of abviouisly lesser beings began, such as calling friends.............On a Sunday night.........for assistance (YEAH!), opening the garage door from the outide car's remote, KNOWING THAT I AM SO ANAL, THAT I WOULD NEVER LEAVE A DOOR UNLOCKED (obviously), crying.................whatever! Then, ..............like 'Ol Chris Cringle' flying down a chimney, the front door flew open, with The Pres. behind it!!! Our PRES., our LEADER, the one we all look up to, admire, "yada yada,".............had found a way to break into my home!!!!!!!!!!!!! (NO, A FULL "HOW TO" WILL NOT BE ON PRIME BY TOMORROW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) AND I WAS NEVER SO HAPPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH, THERE WAS CHEER, THERE WAS LAUGHTER, THERE WAS RELIEF, THERE WERE HUGS.......THERE WAS FRIGGIN' HAPPINESS FLYIN' ALL OVER THE PLACE...........as they would say in NY!!!
True, had it been Bob, he would have called a locksmith to come over, and while on his way over, looked him up in the Better Business Bureau, found out some good dirt on him, and after he finished the job, would have gotten me off with just a slap in the cann! If it had been Pete, he would have hopped into Ms. Purple's car and zoomed past my house so fast, that the immense vacuum from behind the car would have blown my door open! If it were Bailey, I'm sure he would have backed his car 2 feet from my door and cranked his Tubi to blow my door open....while hot babes came out from the passenger seat (ala the lambo. guys)! Should it have been The Don, he would have gotten on the cell, found a dealer who is now open in another part of the world, AND BOUGHT YET ANOTHER CAR..............though my door might still be locked.............but would that have mattered?.....NO, bacause as we all know, ...............IT IS STILL ALL ABOUT "THE DON!"............Or perhaps he would have whipped out his trombone and like an Indian Cobra dancer, blown some sweet tunes into the lock....lulling it to open..........but we likely would have still been out there.....sorry Don! If it were Doc John, he would have X-rayed the krap out of the lock, perhaps weakening the metal to the point that it would have just fallen off the door............but then I, and all beings in a 3 mile radius...........would essentially have been neutered.........thanks Doc.....but some things are more important that a locked door! Had it been Rog, I think that he would have respectfully asked Ms. Purple for her bra, and then placed it over the lock! Again, I am uncertain if that would have helped anything, but we all know Roger and his ongoing 'bra' thing!
In the end, all was well, and I owe Larry B., our Pres., yet another round of Thank You, THANK YOU AND THANK YOU!!!
SO, HOW EXACTLY DID HE GET IN???????........WELL, THAT'S OUR LITTLE SECRET! ..................................WHAT ARE YOU KIDDIN' ME.....................NO, DON'T SEND ME ANY HATE MAIL!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Larry, somehow found a back window that was not fully locked, stuck a credit card in, opened it up........then like Tarzan, swung into the house from the back, and like Hudini.........suprised the gaping- mouthed audience on the other side of the stage!
"LONG LIVE The PRES.!"
Cheers-
Nev
I thought you said the battery was out of the car 
But you have had enough excitement for now so I won't tell you the rest of the gory details 
